Big Time Rush: Skins
by REDHalcyon
Summary: These kids are at the cusp of adulthood, but before they get there, there are lessons to be learned and things to be seen. Nothing is outside of their reach, but at the same time, there's a lot of growing up to do. Big Time Rush: Skins is an AU telling of the boys' and their friends' lives before B.T.R. ever made it big in Hollywood. Mature themes and original characters.


_Hello lovelies! I'm REDHalcyon, formerly known on here as TheStoryofUs way back in the day. It's be a while since I've posted, and a lot of things have happened since then. So let's get everyone on the same page, ok? _

_For those of you who don't know, two years ago I started a story called Skins: BTR. It was an AU telling of the trials and tribulations of the BTR boys and their friends as they navigated through high school. But there was a twist of sorts! It was heavily based in a Skins-like setting. Forget those "kid friendly" story plots that are frequently featured in the television series; like the U.K. show, the story tackled mature themes such as sex, drugs, alcohol, and mental illness while making sure that the boys resembled themselves from the Nickelodeon show. When I got the idea for this story, I had no real vision as to where I was going to take it. I had a basic idea, a general concept, but I didn't really expect that much from it. That's why when the story blew up, I was completely taken back. It was mind blowing to see how many people got into it. People fell in love with the story in a way that I never imagined. It slowly became this vision that wasn't just mine; it was shared with those who created characters for the story, with those who read and reviewed on a regular basis, and with those who simply became fans. _

_Without intending it to happen, the story soon became too much for me to handle. The dream got a little too big for me. The chapters were getting longer and longer, with the last one exceeding 50,000 words. It took months for updates to happen. At times, it felt like I bit off more than I could chew when it came to the expectations that I had set for the story. I had originally planned to have the story divided into five segments: the first two focusing on one group of characters, the next two focusing on another group of characters associated with Katie Knight, and the last segment focusing on both sets of characters. Confusing, right? It required a lot from me, and balancing this with college and other things became impossible. As much as I tried to deny it, I was only humoring myself by saying that I would be able to finish all of this. Even though I didn't want to let anyone down, especially everyone who became so invested in the story, I one day realized in December that it wasn't going to happen. Not like this at least. _

_However, that didn't mean that I wanted to abandon everything, that I wanted to throw all of this away. I wasn't willing to let go of the story, to let go of the connections that I made with a lot of you out there. I thought about it, and I realized that the best way to move forward was to begin again. Start with a new beginning while keeping in mind a few things. It was also a chance to cater to those who continuously stuck by me, no matter how long it took to update (and trust me, it sometimes took a looooooong time). _

_So here we are now. Skins BTR v. 2.0. or Big Time Rush: Skins as I like to call it now. With this installment, there will only be one generation, one group of friends, one set of stories featuring characters from those who have been with me from the beginning. Some are completely new, and for those who have been with me from the start, some are returning but their stories will be different. Whatever their background, they're characters that you'll end up loving regardless. There will be two series, and after the second series, there will be another 5 chapters that will wrap everything up in a nice little bow. The chapters will be shorter (probably around 15,000-20,000...much more reasonable, at least in my opinion), but the heart that was always present will still be the same. _

_For all of you who are returning, welcome back! I hope you're just as excited as I am! I know this took a lot longer than I originally anticipated, but it's finally here. Thank you for everything, and I have my fingers crossed that you'll be happy with everything that I have planned. This story is especially for you guys! And for all of you who are new and who are just getting into this for the very first time, I really hope you guys end up liking this! If original characters aren't your cup of tea, all I have to say is that I hope you give this a go. Like the show, each chapter focuses on a single character, offering the reader an opportunity to better understand a character on a more individual basis. But know that these characters aren't Mary Sues-they're far from that. The creators have come up with characters who are fully fleshed out. If you would like to learn more about the characters (such as figuring out who they are modeled after), take a look at my tumblr: www . skinsbtr . tumblr . com. Once there, click on the character section, and there will be a blurb on each person. Also feel free to look around on the website! It's dedicated to all things about the story, and it'll be updated frequently with news about future updates. _

_With all of that having been said, I've got nothing more to add! That was a really long author's note, but I just wanted to make sure that I got everything out there that I needed to. Now all that's left to do is to read the story! I hope you enjoy this, and if you do, please take the time after to review. Say anything that you want-I love hearing from everyone, and feedback of any kind is always appreciated. _

_**Disclaimer: **__I do not own Big Time Rush nor the lyrics to Ellie Goulding's "Anything Could Happen." Also, I do not own the lyrics to the song "You Don't Own Me" by Lesley Gore. _

_**Dedication: **__To , the creator of Noel. Thank you for creating a character like Noel, and thank you for sticking around! Hope you like the chapter just as much as I like Noel :) _

_**Title Sequence:**__ inwonderlandatalltimes. tumblr post / 38769113615 / 1x01-noel_

* * *

_Big Time Rush: Skins_

* * *

After the war we said we'd fight together  
I guess we thought that's just what humans do  
Letting darkness grow  
As if we need its palette and we need its colour  
But now I've seen it through  
And now I know the truth

That anything could happen  
Anything could happen  
Anything could happen  
Anything could happen  
Anything could happen  
Anything could happen  
Anything could

Baby, I'll give you everything you need  
I'll give you everything you need, oh  
I'll give you everything you need  
But I don't think I need you

~Ellie Goulding: Anything Could Happen

* * *

1.01: Noel

* * *

Noel's eyes fluttered slowly against her will, dragging her away from sleep and bringing her a new day. If things went her way, she would have slipped away quietly in the night; that way when morning finally came, she'd be far away from her body and lost in a stillness that couldn't be reached.

A stillness where her mind could finally rest, could finally stay silent.

The blonde closed her eyes again, but it didn't take long for them to open. Although her room was shrouded in darkness due to the dark purple drapes hanging over the bay windows in her bedroom, her body was alert, and it irritated her that she was wide awake. As she came to, she was overcome by a slight pain that sprawled across her body, starting with a throbbing pulse beating insider he head and ending with a dull ache in her limbs. Her muscles were sore from being pressed against the rough wood of her bedroom floor. Rolling over onto her side, she could see her messed up bed, her covers thrown in all directions. She spotted the pillow that she had stabbed with scissors two nights ago while on one of her drug binges. The feathers were scattered across the room, and she even found one tangled in her light colored hair. Plucking it from her hair, the girl observed it with pensive eyes, her mind drifting into a thought about how each feather was a little reminder of how life had viciously plucked away at her wings.

A reminder that she was grounded here. Now and forever.

Noel shivered as she felt a deep depression slide through her veins. It weighed her down with a force stronger than gravity, but by some miracle, she was able to lift herself off the floor, her knees slightly shaking. Turning towards her nightstand, a soft sigh passed her lips as she found the plastic baggie with her pills, the only friends she wanted and needed now. However, a panic swept through her when she realized that the bag was almost empty. She picked up the bag and counted them, her eyes glossing over with fear when she realized that she only had three left.

"Shit," the girl cursed faintly, her fingers grazing across the plastic bag in an anxious fashion.

How was she going to make it with only three pills left? This was all that she had left, all that she had gathered from her friend back in Boston. How many pills did she have in the beginning? 20? 50? 100? Noel couldn't remember. Either way, she shouldn't have been so careless. She should have used better judgement, should have handled her urges better. Once these pills were gone, she wouldn't be able to get anymore. There wouldn't be any devices left for her to turn to when things at home became too unbearable or when her mind became too loud.

A knock banged against her door, interrupting her thoughts. Although she knew that no one would be able to get in since the door was locked, her panic intensified. She searched for a place to stash the baggie, and as she looked around the chaotic mess that was her bedroom, the banging continued.

"Noel, you better be up, darling!" her mother shrilled from behind the door, her fist now no longer pounding against the barrier that had separated the two all summer. "You don't want to be late for your first day!"

"O-ok," the young girl responded with a shaky breath while tossing the plastic baggie under her bed. "I'm getting ready now."

The teenage girl spun towards her door and waited eagerly for a response that never came. Her mother hadn't tried getting into her room, which was a first. Maybe she had finally gotten the message that Noel didn't want to speak to her or to anyone in the house. Relief settling in, the girl lowered herself to the ground and retrieved the plastic baggie. She stared at the bag, and her thoughts began to cloud, her reasoning dancing with temptation. The day she had been dreading all summer was finally here; she no longer would be able to hide from it.

No longer would be able to hide from _him_.

He was going to see her finally at school, and there was nothing she could do to stop it from happening.

Her stomach clenching with anxiety, Noel took a deep breath and opened the bag. She fished for a random pill and inspected it for a second, a smile ghosting across her face. She liked how these pills calmed her, unlike the other ones that she had been given that threw her into a mad state. Opening her mouth, the girl nimbly tilted her head back as she swallowed the pill. Even though it would take some time for her to feel the effects, she already felt a little better, a little more at ease.

As Noel got ready to shower, the smile never left, but the fear did.

* * *

Noel wanted to see stars all around her; she wanted to feel that she was in a blissed out state of being, but that wasn't the case. She felt nothing. The high hadn't arrived yet, and she was starting to wonder if maybe the pill hadn't worked. Maybe her body had developed a tolerance to it. Maybe it was now the time for her to find something stronger, something more potent. Something that would leave her completely numb. A drug cocktail of sorts.

Maybe a combination of different pills would work. Unlock a world of unheard wonders…

Pushing back the thought, the blonde turned off the radio in her bathroom before inspecting her image for a final time. She wasn't a girl who obsessed over her looks all the time, but that didn't mean that she didn't care about how she looked either. Today her bleach blonde hair was down, her bangs covering her forehead in an attempt to disguise herself from those from her past, from those she left behind years ago. She had applied a pinch of mascara and lip gloss, nothing too daring nor bold. She wore a loose white t-shirt that had "_Not a lot going on at the moment" _written over it in black, glossy font with black denim shorts that exposed a fair amount of her creamy skin. The look was completed with her high top black converse, the only shoes she had besides ballet flats and she would _never_ wear those again.

Noel played with her hair one last time before offering herself a smile, one that was forced. Staring at her reflection, she gave up when it felt too strained, too fake. She wanted to kill her reflection, and the only way she knew how was to turn off the lights. Noel stayed in the darkness for a moment. She felt her heart rate quickening, and she bit her bottom lip in agitation. Why wasn't the pill calming her? Should she take another one?

Taking a deep breath, the blonde let out an agitated cry, a cry of defeat. She sauntered back into her bedroom, and she began to feel lightheaded as she bent over to pick up her black hat from the ground. The sensation made her wonder if the pill was now starting to kick in, and the mere suggestion made her heart beat a little slower, a little more regularly. Humming to herself, she gradually gathered all the things that she would need for today. She decided to leave her books since she figured that her teachers would probably just go over the course syllabus and objectives and save the lecturing for tomorrow. Securing her book bag over her shoulder, she left her bedroom and dashed down the stairs.

But not before locking her door on the way out with the key that she kept on a chain around her neck.

When she reached the final step, Noel glanced around the spacious foyer of her grandparents' house, decorated with expensive gifts from their travels when they were younger. Each part of the house reflected affluence. As a child, it had been her favorite place, but now that she, her younger brother, and her parents lived here, she saw the home as a prison. The walls that had once seemed so vibrant and so colorful were now gray and dull. The air that had once seemed so warm was now cold. There were no happy memories here anymore; there was only decay and loss, a reminder of all the things that had been taken away from her.

Abby Green, Noel's mother, was the breadwinner in the family. A dancer from an early age, she never lost sight of her passion for dance. Even though she knew that she wouldn't make it as a professional dancer, she fed the flame through teaching, handing over her passion to her students. When Noel was six, Abby and her husband took their family and moved from everything they had known in Minnesota to Boston. Here Abby, with a loan from her parents, opened her own studio, the one she had dreamt of ever since she had children. For eight years, the family lived in a golden age, and to Noel, those years seemed like they had happened ages ago. The golden age came to an end when the studio was forced to close, and the family wasn't prepared for the Dark Age that followed.

With no money to their name, the family was forced to close the studio and to come crawling back to Minnesota with their shattered hopes. Having used all their money in order to keep the dream alive, the family was forced to move in with Abby's parents, the only ones who offered their home to the family. Though the house was plenty big for all of them, Noel's grandparents developed a deep resentment, one that was targeted against their daughter and, most of all, her husband. In their eyes, they were failures, incompetent at providing a life for their children. Abby went back to the restaurant that she used to wait at when she was a teenager, while Anthony Green, Noel's father, withered into a bitter man who kept to himself, unable to find work. There were nights where Anthony's yells could be heard overpowering his wife from their bedroom, which used to be an office, and those yells would then be followed by the woman's soft cries. Everyone heard these events, but no one ever spoke about them. They all kept to themselves, ignoring the fact that everyone in the household was deteriorating.

This is why Noel spent her summer inside her bedroom, not wanting to face the wreckage that lay outside her room. She could hide from everyone and deal with her own damaged heart in peace.

A faint aroma came from the kitchen, and the girl followed the scent, even though she wasn't very hungry at the moment. As she traveled to the kitchen, she passed through the living room, the place where her family had happy Christmas dinners in the past. From the corner of her eye, she saw her grandmother sitting in the bay window that overlooked the front of the house, her old, weathered eyes glancing out into the neighborhood.

"Morning grandma," Noel politely greeted. Although she held much anger towards her parents, she had nothing but admiration and gratitude for her grandmother. If it weren't for her convincing her husband otherwise, Noel and her family wouldn't have a roof over their heads.

The older woman kept her eyes glued to the window, but she let out a light noise in acknowledgment. "Morning sweetheart. You excited for your first day of school?"

Noel bit her bottom lip as she struggled to keep herself from laughing at the comment. "Yeah. I guess you could say that, grandma."

"You should be, darling," the matriarch of the household nodded, her eyes closing as she drifted off into her thoughts. "This is like God's grace, you know? A chance to start fresh...you're lucky, Noel."

Noel couldn't help but feel guilty because of the comment. She knew that her grandmother meant well, but she could pick up on the undertones, on the underlying message. However, unfortunately for her, there would never be a fresh start. Whether her grandmother realized it or not, the girl would always carry her past as if it were some anchor wrapped around her foot.

"Where is everyone, grandma?"

The older woman's eyes opened, but she didn't say anything for a brief second. "Your grandfather went to work already, dear, and your mother is in the kitchen with Noah. As for your father…h-he's sleeping still."

Noel flinched at the comment. "I'll see you when I get back today, ok?"

Her grandmother simply nodded as she continued to stare out into the neighborhood. In a few minutes, she would forget all about her brief conversation with her granddaughter.

The blonde teenager continued into the kitchen, and she was surprised to find two plates with sausage, eggs, and toast waiting for her. One was in her usual spot, while her younger brother, Noah, was picking at the food on the other one.

"What's all this for?" Noel asked her brother skeptically as she took her seat next to him.

"It's breakfast, dummy," the younger boy teased with a devilish grin, which disappeared as soon as Noel wacked him in the chest with her hat. "Ouch! What was that for?"

"Noel, be nice," a gentle voice cooed from nearby. Turning around in her chair, the girl was greeted with a friendly smile from her mother, one that Noel refused to return.

"It's a little extravagant, don't you think?" the teenager chirped to herself before pulling the plate towards her. However, the comment didn't go unnoticed.

"I just wanted to make sure that you two were fueled for today," Mrs. Green responded optimistically while pouring herself a cup of coffee. "I know how important today is."

Noel rolled her eyes, not caring that her mother was looking right at her. "Today isn't that important, mom."

"You're so grumpy all of the time," Noah snickered as he leaned into the table. Without any warning, he grabbed Noel's hat and placed it on top of his uncombed hair. He then stuck his tongue out at his older sister as she retrieved her hat from him.

"And you're always a pain in my ass, so I guess that makes us even, you little dick."

"Noel, language!" Mrs. Greene shouted, her voice causing the two siblings to stop their antics. The two mumbled halfhearted apologies to each other before returning to their food. While Noah shoveled down the rest of his, Noel picked at hers with her fork. Happy that there was momentary peace, the mother of two joined her children at the table. The incomplete family sat in silence. Lately whenever they ate together, which wasn't as frequent as it used to be in Boston, this is how they spent the meal together.

After poking at her food for quite some time, Noel pushed her plate from her while mumbling that she wasn't hungry. Looking up at her mother, a thought entered the girl's mind.

"How are we getting to school today if grandpa's at work?"

Mrs. Greene recoiled because of her daughter's tone. "You'll be getting a ride today."

Noel raised an eyebrow at her mother. "Who are we getting a ride from then?"

Noah smirked as he registered his sister's anxious pitch. "Kendall Knight is driving us."

The blonde teenager froze. She could feel her blood turning cold. The person she had been avoiding all summer…the person she didn't want to see…he would be driving her to school.

"W-why is he?"

"Kendall offered when I was talking to him and Jennifer the other day at the restaurant," her mother answered, a puzzled expression on her face as she took in her daughter's strange change in behavior. "And since you wouldn't see him whenever he came over to see you, I thought the two of you could catch up and set aside your differences this way."

"But I don't want to." Noel could feel a storm beginning to sweep inside of her, her heart beating at a rapid pace. "I'm not going."

"I don't get it, Noel," Mrs. Greene began with an exasperated breath as she put her coffee down. "I know why you're mad at me and your father, but Kendall hasn't done a thing to you, at least not that I know of. Why all of the sudden do you want to avoid him?"

Noel could feel herself break out into a cold sweat. Her nerves were jittery again, and she was tempted to race upstairs and take another pill. Not wanting her mother to see her panic, the girl buried her face into her hands.

"I don't want to see him, mom. I don't want to be seen by anybody…"

Mrs. Green's demeanor softened as she watched her daughter. Even though Noel couldn't see it, the older woman's eyes were brimming with sadness, a sadness that she had been struggling with ever since she left Boston defeated. Her daughter was hurting, everyone around her was hurting, and it was all her fault. She was not only a failure when it came to running a dance studio, but she was also a failure when it came to being a mother. And it killed her; it killed her every day.

"You can't keep doing this," the woman paused for a moment as she felt a lump form inside her throat. She turned her head away from Noel, knowing that if she kept looking at her daughter, she'd probably break. "For God's sake Noel, let someone_…__anyone__…_in. What you're doing isn't healthy."

The younger girl lowered her hands from her face. She first looked over at her brother, who was watching the whole scene from the other side of the room. Noel then looked at her mother, and when she locked eyes with her, she momentarily forgot about her panic. Instead she thought about what her mother was going through. They were both hurting for the same reason. They were both covered in the ashes from their burnt dreams, dreams that they both dreamt of together. Teacher and student, mother and daughter; they had been so close.

But that was all gone because Noel couldn't get rid of the anger that she felt towards her mother.

"Kendall's here!" Noah interrupted, dragging the two Green women from their moment. Panic now replaced Noel's empathy for her mother's plight.

"Shit!" the girl cursed. Without saying another word, Noel let her instincts take control as she picked up her backpack and dashed into the living room, ignoring her mother's calls. Standing next to her grandmother, Noel glanced out into the driveway and gasped as she spotted Kendall, the boy she had refused to see whenever he had come over in the summer, getting out of his car.

"Is that the Knight boy?" the grandmother asked her granddaughter curiously while watching the scene unfold from her spot. There was merriment in her tone that hadn't been present in their brief talk earlier. "He sure is easy on the eyes, Noel."

Staring out the window, it was the first time that Noel had seen Kendall since she returned to Minnesota. The sight of him was breathtaking in so many ways. In her eyes, he was gorgeous with his shaggy, dark blond hair and his tall and toned build, which had developed from all the time that he spent on the ice rink. He was gorgeous to look at, but of all of his features, what got Noel the most were the color of his eyes. They were a shade of forest green that haunted her even when he wasn't around. Even when she was gone and lived in Boston, they were sometimes all that she could think about at night.

Hell, she still thought about them, even though she tried not to.

Many feelings were unleashed within her. Looking at him brought a smile to her face, and she felt excited, a feeling that she had almost forgotten about completely. She questioned why she didn't want to see him over the summer, why she ignored his calls and avoided talking to him on Facebook. God, she missed him. Did he miss her, too?

The feeling went away though when their eyes connected. The way he stared at her as he moved towards the house…it shook her to the core and brought her back to reality. She was no longer excited to see him.

Instead, she wanted to run away.

Without any warning, Noel used one hand to keep her hat in place before fleeing from the room. Her feet carried her to the back of the house where the sliding door to the backyard was. Slipping through the door, her hat fell, but she didn't bother to pick it up. Instead, she quickly made her way towards the clearing in her yard that led to the woods. This would be her escape route. Her pace gradually became faster as she disappeared into the woods. She wouldn't look back behind her, fearful that she would see Kendall chasing after her. The sound of crunching leaves and sticks breaking created an aesthetic that kicked start her fight-or-flight response. Without even realizing it, she broke out into a run, the scenery flying past her in amazing swirls. Everything blurred into unrecognizable patterns. Maybe now the pill was starting to kick in, starting to wreak its havoc on her fragile little mind.

But the movements came to a halt when her feet made vicious contact with asphalt, and it caught her off balance. She crashed into the ground, her knees scrapping against the pavement while she extended her hands out in a failed attempt to stop herself from falling. It was bewildering to think that she didn't realize that she had left the forest until now. Before she could pick herself from the ground, a loud, screeching sound caught her attention. She turned her head and froze in place as a red van dangerously came towards her. She knew that she should get out of the way, but her body was paralyzed, unable to react. The only thing she could do was to shut her eyes and to prepare herself for the impact.

However, the collision never came.

The sounds of the car breaking made her eyes open. Her breathing accelerated, she gasped as she saw that there was less than an inch of space between her and the van. It was a close call, but she had made it. Pushing herself from the ground, the blonde cursed as she felt a sharp pain in her knees. To her dismay, her knees were scratched and scraped. But things could have been far worse than that.

Before she could flee from the scene, Noel heard the sound of a car door opening. Bringing a hand to her face in order to shield out the sun, she narrowed her pale blue eyes and spotted a pair of long, thin legs swinging out from the car and a blonde girl stepped out onto the pavement.

"What the hell is wrong with you? Are you trying to get killed?"

Noel felt a wave of uneasiness sweep through her. The stranger looked to be the same age as her, but other than being youthful, the two couldn't be more different from each other visually. This girl had a high-fashion edge, creating an aura about her that made her out to be like a supernova. She wore a green top with a dark navy cropped jacket over it, and purple tights under her black and white stripped shorts. A vintage pearl necklace around her neck, the girl's blonde hair was done in an elegant ponytail, and her makeup was dark and heavy, a contrast from Noel's simplicity. The teenager trotted towards Noel, her stormy eyes glaring daggers at her.

The two were soon faced to face, and Noel was at a loss for words as the girl eyed her suspiciously, mentally critiquing everything about her. The way this girl carried herself, the way she exuded confidence…her body language screamed that she was ready to go to war if necessary.

"Earth to oddness, what are you staring at?"

Before Noel could muster a reply, another girl got out of the car. However, unlike her friend, the new person had darker hair and darker skin, but her taste in fashion was just as extravagant.

"Andrea, just let it go! We're going to be late!"

The blonde smirked playfully, but she chose to ignore her friend. Her attention was still centered on Noel. Andrea's demeanor was purposely cold. Noel felt as if the girl was looking down at her, even though the two were roughly the same height.

Noel's eyes flickered between the two, her throat drying. "S-sorry."

The apology had come out unevenly, and the response only brought out a tiny chuckle from the mean girl, one that made Noel feel even smaller. Her fight-or-flight response kicking in again, Noel made her escape and headed in the direction towards her new school.

Andrea wrapped her arms around her stomach, her eyes narrowing in confusion as she watched the girl disappear.

"Stupid bitch."

Shaking her head, the leggy blonde pirouetted to the side and made eye contact with her friend Callie.

"Was that really necessary, Andrea?" the girl asked, her expression suggesting that she was highly annoyed about the event.

Andrea shrugged before heading towards the car. As she settled into her seat, she turned to look at the girl sitting behind her.

"You alright, Elle?" she asked with a concern and a sweetness that was only reserved for Elizabeth McIntosh, her best friend since kindergarten.

Elizabeth, a brown-eyed girl with blonde hair, said nothing. Instead, she weakly shook her head before turning to look outside the window. Knowing her best friend as well as she knew herself, Andrea reached over to place a comforting hand on the girl's knee. She then changed her disposition and used her free hand to poke at the male in the driver's seat.

"And what about you, J.C.? You shit yourself there?"

"Shut up," the blond male snapped, causing Andrea and Callie to laugh at him. He slammed his fist against the steering wheel. "I didn't even see her there…I didn't…Fuck!"

"Relax, dude. Don't want to get yourself in a tizzy for nothing," Callie giggled from behind.

"Besides, the way she just appeared out of nowhere, it was as if she wanted you to hit her," Andrea teased.

J.C. cocked his head to the side and gave the girl an incredulous stare. "Thanks, bitch. That _really_ makes me feel so much better."

Andrea giggled at the comment as she removed her hand from Elizabeth's knee. Settling into her seat, the girl brushed a strand of hair away from her face.

"Nothing comes out of nothing, so let's get a move on, ok? I'm not starting junior year without my skinny latte from Starbucks."

* * *

As she surveyed her surroundings, Noel couldn't help but feel like an ant trapped in the land of giants. Everything about the new school was new to her and unlike the environment that she was accustomed to back in Boston. Having to navigate through the school was like swimming in the ocean. It was all overwhelming, but at the same time, it provided her reassurance. At least now she had a better chance of going unnoticed. She could meld into the scenery, disappear from the map.

Having received her schedule from the principal, Noel now followed a crowd of students into the school's gymnasium. On the first day of school, all of the students gathered in the gymnasium to kick off the year. As she stepped into the room, she tried not to look like a deer caught in headlights. Everywhere she looked she saw students piling up on the bleachers, their voices all contributing to the loud echo that contributed to the loud atmosphere. The teenagers were all looking for their friends, looking for familiar faces to sit by and chat with until the assembly began. Excitement filled the air, and even Noel couldn't deny that it wasn't contagious. It made her wish that she wasn't so lonely.

Taking a deep breath, Noel found an empty spot in the middle of the left side bleachers. It looked appealing because she figured that it would allow her to blend with everyone. Her head kept to the ground, the girl tepidly made her way to the spot and sat down. She cursed to herself as she glanced at her cut-up knees, and she thought about how her morning had transpired. She really knew how to start things off with a _bang_.

Sighing deeply, the blonde found herself in a trance as the pep band appeared. To her surprise, they were actually decent, and without her even realizing it, she tapped along to the school's fight song. But once she realized what she was doing, she ceased her movements.

As it got closer to the starting time, more and more people began to fill the empty seats around her. Anxiety began to grip at her as she watched the row in front of her fill up. In her row, there were only two other people at the moment, and they were at the opposite end from her. Noel decided to look over her schedule, thinking that it would be the perfect distraction from the tension that she was feeling. Plus, she had no idea what classes her mother had signed her up to take.

Art. Spanish 3. Honors English. Chemistry. Lunch. Pre-Calculus. Geography. Gym.

Besides Honors English, her semester would be fairly easy, just as she wanted it to be. Noel had always been a good student. Dancing instilled in her the discipline needed to be on top of her studies. As much as she found homework to be a hassle at times, she always did her work to the best of her abilities.

While folding up her schedule, her ears picked up on a familiar sound from behind her, a familiar, distinct laugh that she knew all too well. A chill ran down her spine. That laugh belonged to one person only, to a person she was trying so hard to avoid.

Kendall Knight.

She knew it would be dangerous, but that didn't stop her from turning to look. Her throat tightened as soon as she spotted the boy all the way at the top of the bleachers. Kendall wasn't alone; he was sitting with James Diamond, Logan Mitchell, Carlos Garcia, and Mona Blue, Carlos's cousin. A tender smile crept on Noel's face. She hadn't seen them in forever. She had always said that she would come back to visit, but she never did. The only one she kept in touch with was Kendall and Logan, and out of the two, she was always closest with Kendall. Kendall even went out to visit her one summer when they were 13. Though the distance separated them, Noel and Kendall were always talking with each other, always thinking about the other.

The day they stopped talking was when Noel came back to Minnesota.

Noel continued to watch the group as they continued to laugh and joke around with each other. They may have grown since she last saw them, but other than that, they were still the same.

And that was the moment she knew that she really missed them, that she needed them more than she could take.

_'No,'_ she mentally told herself, '_It's better this way.' _

Knowing that she had been watching them for too long, the blonde tore herself away from the scene. She wrapped her arms around herself and looked out onto the court, her mind drifting far away. Noel contemplated what her grandmother had said to her earlier. _A fresh start. _Was it really possible to start over? To begin again? Besides her childhood friends, no one else knew her. She could masquerade as someone new. She could become the popular girl if she wanted or the art junkie if she desired. Hell, she could even being a band geek.

She could even try to be her old self again.

Anything could happen as long as she forced herself to move on, to forget about the broken dreams.

"Excuse me," a quiet voice broke through Noel's pensive state, bringing her back to reality. Noel cocked her head to the side and saw that the shy voice belonged to a boy with fair skin and chocolate colored hair. She examined him briefly and could immediately tell that he was a nervous wreck.

"D-do you mind if I sit next to you?"

A cloud of confusion clouded the girl's face. "Huh?"

Once Noel spoke, the boy took a step back, a crimson flush spread up from under his collar. "I'm so-sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. I, um, I was just...I don't..."

Sympathizing with the boy's nervousness, the blonde scooted over and made room for the boy. "Make yourself comfortable."

The boy offered her a smile as embarrassment washed over him."Thank you, thank you. It's my first day here, and I don't know anyone."

As the boy sat down next to her, Noel took the time to properly look at him. Unlike most of the kids at school, this kid was dressed very nicely, the designer logo on his red and blue striped polo suggesting that he came from an affluent home. There was an air of innocence surrounding him, and although she didn't even know his name, she felt calm around him. Looking into his eyes, she was taken aback by how_ his light blue eyes sparkled with high hopes and wild dreams. _

Of new beginnings...

"It's my first day here, too," the girl managed to respond warmly as she tucked her hand under her chin.

A huge, silly grin appeared on the boy's face. "Really? That's so cool! My name's Charlie!"

He offered Noel his hand, and the blonde shook his hand.

"Noel," the girl laughed as she introduced herself. "It's nice to meet you, Charlie."

"Nice to meet you, too!" Charlie chirped enthusiastically."So, are you from around here?"

The blonde girl shrugged. "Kinda. I grew up here until I turned six. Then my my family and I lived in Boston for ten years before...deciding to come back."

Charlie couldn't contain his excitement over the news. "Boston? I lived there once! My family and I lived there for a few months before my pa got a job in New York."

Noel arched her eyebrow. "New York, huh? Did you live in the city?"

"I did! It's _amazing__, _the best. No other place like it in the world, and trust me, I've been to pretty much everywhere...," the boy paused for a moment and thought over what he had just said. "N-not that I'm bragging, but-"

The girl interrupted with a tiny chuckle, her way of reassuring him that she knew he didn't mean any harm.

"I get it. I've been there a few times as well, and I totally get what you mean. I once thought about going there for dancing..."

When the words slipped from her, she felt a strain in her smile. She was surprised that she felt comfortable enough to share this information with Charlie. Over the summer, she had tried vehemently to distance herself from her past as a dancer, but somehow it managed to slip through the cracks.

Oblivious to what was going through Noel's head at the moment, Charlie's eyes widened in surprise. "Dancing? You dance?"

Noel shook her head, trying to dispel the boy's excitement. "I don't anymore. Why, do you?"

"Yes, of course!" the boy proclaimed as his silly grin spread across his face. "I've been doing it ever since my parents took me to see the ballet for the first time when I was five! God, it's the best, I love it! If you don't mind me asking, why did you stop?"

The girl angled her body away from the boy, hoping the distance would be enough to conceal her heavy heart.

"It's a long and boring story," the girl huffed before turning her head away from Charlie. "I basically just lost interest."

Charlie gasped in surprise. "Lost interest? That's impossible! You should get back into it! I mean, we could dance together! I've never had a dancing partner before, and I think it would be so much fun. Every night I go to the dance studio at the rec center, and no one's ever there so it's perfect. You should come!"

Noel exhaled deeply, not really paying attention to what Charlie had said. The boy was about to say something else when he was cut off by someone clearing her throat in order to get their attention. The ex-dancer turned her head, and her jaw dropped when she found herself looking at the blonde girl from earlier.

"Looks like you're in our way again," Andrea daintily chided, a smug look on her face as she relished in the stupid look on Noel's face. Standing behind Andrea was Elizabeth, who looked uncomfortable as her best friend caused a scene. The two blondes were trying to get to Callie and J.C., the two people who were a few seats away from Noel and Charlie.

Charlie mirrored Noel's look. Although he didn't know what was going on, he was intimidated by the girl's disposition. He immediately stood up and yanked Noel up with him. The action caused Andrea to giggle, while Elizabeth muttered a faint _'thanks_.' Andrea and Elizabeth quickly moved past Noel and Charlie, and Andrea shot one last look to Noel.

"Try not to make it a habit, ok?"

Noel's eyes never left Andrea as she and Elizabeth took their seats next to their friends. She watched as Andrea leaned in and whispered something into J.C.'s ear before turning to point at her. The two laughed at her, and Noel's stomach clenched tightly.

Trying to block them out, Noel resumed sitting down, this time angling herself so that she didn't see them.

"Do you know that girl?" Charlie inquired softly as he sat down in his seat. He looked over nervously at Andrea and her friends, afraid that they might have overheard him talking about them.

Noel quickly shook her head. "Just some prissy bitch from earlier."

Charlie gulped before turning his gaze away from the mean girl and her posse. A faint blush returning to his face, he turned his attention away from Noel as the principal made his way to the center of the gymnasium.

"That's...that's really unfortunate to hear."

* * *

It was only fourth period, but Noel was ready to throw in the towel. A higher power had to be working against her; something was out to get her. Her first grievance for the day was that she had Art and English with Andrea, who's last name is French. Andrea French. At first, Noel couldn't believe it when she first heard the name called out by the art teacher during attendance. The bitch couldn't have had a more pretentious name even if she had tried to come up with one herself. Thankfully though the two girls went out of their way to avoid each other, but Andrea's presence was enough to get under Noel's skin, leaving the new girl on edge throughout their classes together.

Regardless of this, Noel kept reminding herself that Andrea was the least of her worries. There were other people to worry about, other people to avoid. People who were probably patrolling the hallways in search of her (or at least that's what Noel chose to think). There were a couple of close calls where she almost ran into the people from her past. For example, her homeroom was right across from James', and the two briefly made eye contact before he was dragged away by some dark haired girl named Stella. After that, Carlos almost ran into her during the passing period after her first class. The fiery latino almost took her out while racing down the hallway, not caring that he was colliding into everyone and everything in his way. While at her locker just now, Noel spotted Mona from the corner of her eye, but Mona was too busy conducting some sort of secret business with Bo, a tall, brown-haired free spirit who was twenty minutes late for Spanish.

All of these near run-ins made Noel realize that blending in was going to be harder than she thought. If she wanted to go unnoticed, she was going to have to try harder; otherwise, it would only be a matter of time before she came face to face with any of them. Yet, at the same time, a tiny part of her was looking forward to the inevitable reunion. She was beginning to question why she wanted to avoid her old friends in the first place.

Checking the time on her cell phone, Noel cursed out loud when she saw that there was a minute left in the passing period. She picked up her pace and sprinted down the nearly empty hallway. With not being familiar with the school's layout, she ran past her classroom, and by the time she had figured out her mistake, the bell had begun to ring, indicating the beginning of fourth period. She groaned at her luck. Hoping not to be counted tardy, the girl flew into the classroom, and in the process of doing so, she ended up crashing into her teacher.

"I'm, I'm so sorry, sir," the girl apologized. Her face burned from embarrassment as laughter rang in her ears. The older man laughed, unfazed by the incident.

"Accidents happen. Find your table assignment from the clipboard over there," the teacher pointed to a lab bench that faced the rest of the class.

Nodding at him nervously, the young blonde scampered to the lab bench, her face to the ground in order to conceal the blush that was creeping across her face. After finding the clipboard, Noel's eyes instantly found her name on the seating chart, not paying attention to the name of the person sitting next to, the person she'd be working with throughout the semester. Turning around, she spotted her seat right away as it was the only available spot in the classroom. Her eyes then drifted to the other person sitting at the table.

Kendall Knight.

Noel felt her breath hitch inside her chest, her lungs momentarily forgetting how to pull in oxygen. Their eyes found each other like kindred spirits. In that moment, a moment that seemed to last forever, there was no one else in the classroom; it was just the two of them.

A snap of someone's fingers ended the trance. Looking over her shoulder, Noel was met by a confused stare from her teacher.

"You going to stand there while I teach, miss?"

Noel could feel herself turning redder, knowing that everyone's eyes were on her. Biting her bottom lip, the girl walked towards the back of the room. With each step she took, her heart rate sped up. Although she tried to keep her eyes to the floor, they acted on their own and kept a hold on Kendall's. His eyes were bold and daring, a playful glimmer sparkling in forest green sea. She felt like a rabbit being cornered by a wolf.

There was no turning back now.

The teacher talked to the class as Noel took her seat. Every muscle in her body tensed as she felt Kendall's eyes on her. As she opened her binder, her arm brushed against Kendall's. Their skins touched, and Noel swore that she felt sparks. There was plenty of room for them to spread out on the table, but Kendall made sure that they stayed close, as if he wanted to be within reach in case she decided to runaway from him again.

It took everything she had to stay still, to keep her focus on the teacher. However, her restraint was weakening as a wave of flashbacks hit her. She remembered the nights they spent catching fireflies in Kendall's backyard, the summer days they wasted feeding ducks at a nearby pond, and the frequent trips they made to the ice skating rink with James, Carlos, and Logan. The memories were bittersweet, and those days were long gone. The magic wasn't here anymore.

A smirk etched on his lips, Kendall leaned forward until his lips were dangerously close to her ear.

"Nice to finally see you, lab partner."

His voice, which was gentle in tone but firm in delivery, sent a shiver down her spine. "H-hi..."

The smirk on Kendall's face vanished. "Where have you been?"

His breath was warm against her skin. Licking her lips, Noel inhaled sharply, trying desperately to take control over her body. She hated how he had this effect over her, how he was making her lose control. She shifted her seat away from him in an effort to get away from him.

The hockey stud was hurt by the action. He was confused by it, confused by everything that Noel had put him through over the summer. Kendall was never good at keeping his emotions in check, and as he continued to look at Noel, anger boiled within him.

"You can't be serious, Noel," Kendall harshly whispered, his tone biting. If he didn't calm himself down now, his anger would get the best of him. He didn't want things to be like this; he didn't want to be angry with Noel. He wanted a fresh start, for things to go back to normal if possible. But his heart ruled over his brain. "Are you seriously going to keep this up?"

Noel jolted in her seat because of Kendall's tone. Something snapped inside of her, and she turned to look at him. The sight of him made her blush, made her feel more uneasy. Although his voice had been cold, the look on his face suggested otherwise. He looked wounded, and in that moment, she wanted nothing more than to fix him.

"Kendall, I..."

"I'm sorry, alright?" Kendall interjected softly. "Whatever it is I did, I'm sorry."

"Mr. Knight and Ms. Greene," the teacher's voice boomed from the front of the classroom, causing the two teenagers to look towards him. "Do I need to separate you two?"

Kendall let out a long breath while shaking his head. "No, sir."

"Then I suggest you two stay quiet until the bell rings," the teacher nodded as he picked up a stack of papers and started to distribute them to the class.

Kendall leaned back into his chair and let out another sigh. Scratching the back of his neck, the boy raised an eyebrow at Noel as her hand shot up into the air.

"Ms. Green, what is it?"

Noel closed her binder forcefully, and she did her best not to fall apart in front of Kendall. "Actually, maybe it would be best to switch partners. It...it would cause less trouble."

She didn't bother to turn her head towards Kendall. She could feel him staring at her, his eyes plucking at her skin. Noel could only imagine what was going through his head at the moment.

The teacher blinked several times, surprised by the young girl's response. "Oh...ok. Let's see...Ms. Pierce, switch with her, please."

Noel gathered her belongings and once again felt all eyes on her. As she pushed back her chair, she quickly glanced over at Kendall. For the first time since she had entered the classroom, he wasn't looking at her. Instead, he was staring down at the ground, his bangs concealing his eyes. From the way his shoulders were hunched, Noel's fear that he was angry was easily confirmed.

Noel held onto her binder as if it were a shield. Walking to her new assigned seat, the blonde locked eyes briefly with Stella, the same girl that she had spotted with James earlier. The brunette had a pleased look on her face, and Noel swore that the girl mouthed _'thank you' _at her. The ex-dancer looked away and dropped her binder onto the table. Taking her seat, the blonde let out a staggered breath. She then felt someone tugging at her sleeve. Turning to the side, Noel was met by a goofy grin from Bo, her new lab partner.

"Hey, I hope you don't mind doing everything. I'm pretty much useless when it comes to this stuff," Bo joked lightly, his face breaking out into a sly smile.

Noel shook her head, failing to return the smile. "That's fine. I can do it..."

This was going to be a long year.

* * *

As soon as the bell rang, Noel was gone faster than a bat out of hell. Her feet stomped against the ground, and her mind was in a frantic state. A hand grabbed onto her wrist, bringing her to a screeching halt.

"What the hell was that?"

Noel felt her legs shake. She attempted to escape Kendall's grip, but there was no way he was going to let go of her. At least not until he got some kind of explanation.

"Kendall, I can't do this," the girl conceded in a decrepit hum. She was begging him to let her go, but her please went unanswered by his scowl. All he could see was red. "I need to get to lunch. I'm meeting someone."

"Cut the shit, Noel. You're just trying to get away from me like you did all summer."

"Stop flattering yourself, _Knight_," Noel retaliated sternly, which caused Kendall to take a minor step back. "Not everything concerns you."

Kendall's grip loosened on the girl's wrist. "What happened to you? You're not...you're not _you_."

Noel's wrist dropped back to her side. Her eyes widened at the comment, and Kendall realized that he may have gone too far.

"Noel, I didn't-"

Before he could finish his apology, the world around him went black as a pair of hands covered his eyes.

"Guess who, gorgeous?" a feminine voice cooed into his ear.

Kendall inwardly sighed, the tension being displaced as Andrea French removed her hands. The boy kept his stare on Noel while his girlfriend leaned against him, her arm interlocking around his bicep. Andrea planted a feathery kiss on his cheek before turning her attention to the girl standing before them. Immediately, she turned grim.

"You two know each other?" Andrea asked with fake amusement, disgust clearly visible on her face.

Noel glared at Andrea before shifting her leer to Kendall. "I was just going to say the same thing."

Kendall shuffled in place. It didn't take a genius to figure out that something had happened between the two blondes, and knowing of Andrea's tendency for following the warpath, he was now stuck in the middle. The teenager flicked an eyebrow at Noel.

"Andrea, this is Noel, my...friend, I guess. Noel, Andrea, my girlfriend."

"Girlfriend?" Noel laughed. "Isn't that...perfect."

Andrea shot the new girl a questioning glance. "Problem?"

"Oh no," Noel smirked mockingly before tilting her head towards Kendall. "Just surprised, that's all."

The girlfriend brushed off the response and placed another kiss on her boyfriend's cheek. Her arms than snaked up around his neck. She then leaned in so that her lips her pressed close to his ear.

"Where you going to come to the mall after school, love? You can help me pick out something to wear for tonight."

Kendall tried to push the girl away from, clearly not comfortable with the public displays of affection. "I can't. Hockey practice, remember?"

"Oh," the girl uttered faintly, her demeanor saddening as she realized her boyfriend's uneasiness. She let go of him while batting her eyelashes. "I guess it'll be a surprise for you then!"

The hockey player nodded. While Andrea pulled at her clothes, he snuck a quick glance at Noel.

"That reminds me," Kendall began as he turned his gaze back to his girlfriend. "J.C.'s going to have to get our alcohol for tonight."

Andrea drew her face into a tight grimace. "Can't you go after?"

"No, I can't," Kendall shook his head while trying to conceal his annoyance. "My boss is getting suspicious, and you know that I can't afford to lose my job."

"But J.C.'s fake sucks!" Andrea complained.

"It's..." Kendall paused as he searched for the right word to describe it, "...kinda like a real I.D."

"Yeah, if J.C. was forty and Latino!"

Kendall's ears picked up on Noel's hushed giggles, which made him break out into a grin. "Well, J.C. sorta looks Mexican."

"Ugh, whatever," Andrea rolled her eyes, her way of waving the white flag in defeat. "I'll talk to him at lunch, which I _wished _we had together."

"Me, too," Kendall's smile intensified as an idea popped into his head, "but you wanna know who does?"

"Who?"

The boy flicked an eyebrow at Noel. "Why don't you have Noel sit with you guys? Logan will be there, so she'll know someone else."

Andrea whipped her head towards Noel. "You know Logan, too?"

"Back in the day, Noel was just one of the guys," Kendall answered for Noel, his eyes never leaving her. It took everything to stop himself from laughing at Noel's signature scowl, a look that was only reserved for him and nobody else. "Wish I could stay and chat longer, but I've got to get to P.E."

Since it was expected of him, Kendall leaned in and kissed Andrea goodbye. "See you later."

"I love you," the girl chirped gently, waiting futilely for him to say those three words back.

"You, too," he smiled before carefully winking at Noel once Andrea had her back to him. With a tiny hint of a smile on her face, Noel watched longingly as Kendall walked away from the two. Her silent vigil was ended when she heard Andrea clear her throat.

"You coming or not?"

Digging her hands into her pockets, Noel reluctantly followed Andrea as the two headed in the opposite direction as Kendall. Noel struggled to keep up with Andrea, and it seemed as if the taller girl was trying to shake the new girl off her trail.

"So," Andrea finally spoke without bothering to slow down her pace, "how is that you know _my_ Kendall again? I wasn't paying attention earlier, so..."

"Childhood friends," Noel gulped uneasily, not taking a liking to where the conversation was heading. "We were practically raised together because our mothers were best friends in high school."

"Huh," Andrea spun around suddenly, causing Noel to tumble back a bit. Her head slightly cocked to the side, the girl sized Noel up as if she were a competitor that she would be meeting in the fighting ring later. "Kendall has never mentioned you once since we've been together, and now you're unexpectedly everywhere I turn. Funny, don't you think?"

Noel shivered as the other girl gave her a smile that practically screamed murder.

"Look, if you're gonna start shit, can you please get it over with, so that I can-"

"What shit?," Andrea squinted her eyes together, a vague look spreading across her face. The two engaged in a stare off that came to a quick conclusion when Noel averted her eyes to her feet. Mentally reminding herself to relax, Andrea let out a staggered breath before extending the olive branch to Noel.

"Well, seeing as you are Kendall's friend, and I'm, well, dating him, it would be best to get along. No hard feelings?"

Noel kept her eyes planted to the ground, but she nodded her head in agreement. "Sure. No hard feelings..."

"Wonderful," Andrea smiled, feeling a bit better about the situation. The issue settled and buried, the two girls resumed their walk to the cafeteria, only this time they walked side by side. Glancing over at the other girl, Noel decided to try and converse with Andrea.

"So, how long have you and Kendall been dating?"

"Since June," the girl responded simply. She then captured Noel's gaze and her disposition hardened. "Why do you ask?"

"Just curious," Noel offered a friendly smile. "I just...can't believe Kendall is actually seeing someone."

"Well you better believe it," Andrea retorted while harshly stopping in place. "We're in love."

Noel shifted uncomfortably. "Th-that's just it. I've known Kendall for so long that it's hard for me to believe that he's actually found love. I mean, I still see him as that little kid that I grew up with, you know?"

Andrea peeked around to see if anybody was near them. With the coast clear, the leggy blonde stepped closer towards Noel, her face contorted into an intimidating glower.

"Listen," the girl lowered her tone in order to let the new girl know that she was being completely seriously, "I know we're starting over and everything, but let me make one thing clear, ok? If you try to pull something over me, know that I will fucking destroy, alright?"

Noel took a step back, her eyes widening as she registered what she had just heard. "Is...are you threatening me?"

"I wouldn't call it a threat," Andrea laughed at the girl, her eyes twinkling with amusement, "but then again, I'm not you so...feel free to call it whatever you like."

With one last triumphant giggle, Andrea shot one last menacing look before continuing down the hallway. Noel didn't move, and in fact, she wasn't even thinking. The words had knocked her off course, and she still trying to process everything.

"Come on reckless," Andrea called out, snapping Noel out from her spell. "We're running late."

* * *

As she observed Andrea from across the cafeteria, Noel felt her grip tighten on her lunch tray. The new girl was supposed to join her and her friends, but she couldn't will herself to go over there. She knew what would be in store for her: awkwardness and laughs made at her expense. Her recent talk with the Queen of Mean was still fresh, stinging in her mind like a brand new cut.

Noel flinched as she recalled word for word what Andrea had told her. What she said had been a threat, and it didn't settle well with the uneasy girl. She had done nothing of merit to get on Andrea's bad side; there was no reason for the girl to hate her like this, and in light of all of the bad things in her life now, Noel didn't deserve this treatment, didn't deserve to be bullied. All she wanted to do was go unnoticed, to not be seen.

Feeling her grip loosen, Noel decided to go find an empty table somewhere else. As soon as she spun on her heels, a figure from her past emerged out of the boy's restroom. The blonde blinked a few times, recognition slowly coming to her.

"Logan?"

Not expecting to have his name called, the raven-haired boy jumped, his head snapping in the girl's direction. When he realized who had called his name, his nerves settled, a cockeyed grin expanding across his face.

"Noel!" the boy waved, and there was no doubt that he was happy to see her.

There was vague confusion in the blonde's expression as Logan made his way towards her. Even though she hadn't seen him physically in years, she detected that there was something off with him. Here his jitteriness, which had always been a characteristic of his highly neurotic self, could be seen as a cover up, a diversion of sorts to conceal a secret. There was a speck of fear in his eyes, one usually seen in those who have been caught in the act of something scandalous. His cheeks were flushed and his hair a bit disheveled, the collar to his polo popped. However, she pushed aside her suspicion as soon as the boy came up to her.

"I'm so happy you're back!" he exclaimed with a cheeky smirk. He tried moving in for a hug, but he accidentally bumped into the girl's lunch tray. His lips curling down in frustration, he clumsily tried maneuvering around it before giving up.

"I'm happy to see you, too," Noel laughed as the boy ruffled with her hair instead. "You have no idea how much I've missed you, Logie."

"Same here," the boy nodded. "Are you eating lunch with anyone?"

"I don't know," Noel bit her bottom lip as she glanced over at Andrea's table. "I was going to sit over there, but..."

A cool little half-smile curved on his lips. "Ah, I take it you've met Kendall's girlfriend."

"Yeah," Noel whipped her head back to look at her old friend. "What's her deal anyway?"

"Andrea's...dramatic," Logan shrugged his shoulders as he wasn't quite sure how to describe the girl accurately. "She loves theater and acting. The girl's full-on all the time. It's the best and worst thing about her."

Noel frowned with her eyebrows. "And Kendall puts up with that?"

Logan boy picked up on Noel's disapproval. "She's really not bad, Noel. Take my word on it. Come sit with us."

"Us?" Noel's mouth opened in surprise. "You're gonna sit over there?"

The raven-haired boy looked taken aback by the comment. "Yeah, why wouldn't I? They're my friends."

Noel winced as if Logan's declaration had injured her. In a way, it did hurt to hear him say that. How could Logan Mitchell, the shy little boy that used to play house with her, consider people like Andrea his friends? What did that say about his character now? About how he had changed since she had left town? She started to feel guilty because of these thoughts. Who was she, of all people, to question if Logan had changed for the worse? She was in no place to make such judgements.

After all, her original plan was to blend in and avoid her old friends. What did that say about her? How did Logan see her now? Did he think that she had changed for the worse, that she had been drastically altered? And now that she thought about it, how does Kendall think of her?

Logan could sense that Noel was feeling self-conscious. He placed a reassuring hand on Noel's shoulder, his way of letting her know that she would be alright. "Come on. We won't bite..._much_."

Without giving her the chance to runaway, the male escorted his old friend towards the lunch table where Andrea and her friends sat. Even though Logan was trying to make her feel better, Noel's stomach was weighed down with dread. Every alarm and whistle went off inside her head, warning her to turn around, but her legs kept moving.

"Hey guys," Logan greeted the group with a warm, friendly grin.

Looking up from her camera, Elizabeth squealed as Logan sat down next to her. "Logie, I've missed you! I haven't seen you all day!"

"Missed you, too," Logan chuckled as the blonde girl leaned in to hug him. The raven-haired boy noticed that Noel was standing next to him, her eyes darting everywhere but at the people sitting at the table. He lightly nudged his elbow into the girl's side and nodded towards the open seat in front of him. Her eyes now planted to the ground, Noel reluctantly made her way to the spot.

Logan caught everyone's attention and then point to her as she sat down next to Callie. "Guys, have you met Noel yet? Over the summer she moved back here from Boston."

Elizabeth set aside her camera next to Andrea, who was sitting right of her. Her best friend, who hadn't spoken much at all since she had sat down, was idly stirring a plastic spoon in her half-eaten yogurt. Sighing to herself, Elizabeth turned her head towards Noel and offered her a friendly smile. "Hi, I'm Elizabeth."

"I'm J.C.," the blond boy sitting in front of Andrea waved while leaning back "Sorry about almost hitting you with my car earlier."

A furious blush colored Noel's face. "I-it's ok. No harm done."

The dark skinned girl sitting next to her laughed. "Yeah, that was a crazy start to the morning. How about a cupcake to make up for it? I have an extra since skinny bitch over there doesn't want hers."

"Yeah, sure," Noel meekly replied, a part of her starting to feel a little more comfortable. While Callie retrieved a cupcake from the tupperware container in front of her, Noel snuck a glance at Logan, and the boy winked at her before she was handed her desert.

"Thanks," Noel smiled as she held the cupcake in her hands, forgetting about the slice of pizza on her lunch tray. "Did you make them yourself?"

"All from scratch, yeah," Callie boasted lightly while giving Logan his cupcake. "I even made the butterscotch frosting."

Noel ripped off a tiny piece and placed it into her mouth. She let out a tiny moan as she chewed on it. For someone who wasn't a big fan of deserts in general, she was pleasantly surprised by how delicious it tasted. Once she had swallowed, she ripped off another piece, one that was larger than the first. "Oh my God, this is amazing."

"Callie is an amazing chef," Elizabeth devilishly smirked, her eyes sparkling with playfulness. "Her _goodies_ always taste the best."

"If you think her cupcakes are good, then you should try her cake," J.C. responded with a suggestive flick of his eyebrows, fully eager to join in on the euphemism. "It just squirts in your mouth."

"Why go for the cake when you can just lick her bowl?" Elizabeth giggled innocently, causing Logan to choke on his water.

"Oh, Callie's bowl is finger-licking good," J.C. teased in a seductive whisper before blowing hot air into the girl's face. Everyone around the table was laughing except for Callie and Andrea. However, the grin on the baker's face revealed that she had been amused by the two.

"Fuck the both of you," Callie shoved the blond away from her. Brushing a strand of her dark hair behind her ear, the girl then cocked her head Noel. "But for real, my cooking is the shit."

As the group shared another laugh together, Andrea glanced over with menacing eyes. She let out a disgusted groan when she spotted the food on Noel's plate.

"Are you really going to eat all that?" Andrea asked, her debonair delivery putting a complete end on the group's merriment.

Noel shrugged her shoulders as she matched Andrea's condescending stare. "What's the big deal if I do?"

"That right there," the thespian pointed at the food with her spoon, "is, like, a gazillion calories."

"Don't mind her, Noel," J.C. spoke up in defense for her while narrowing his eyes at Andrea. "Annie gets cranky when there's only yogurt in her system."

Andrea was about to tell the boy to fuck off but was interrupted when she felt someone sliding into the spot next to her. Before she could turn her head to see who it was, the leggy blonde felt an arm wrap snake around her shoulder, pulling her against the unknown person's body.

"Hey, Andrea," Bo McGuire greeted in a flirtatious manner. "Did you miss me over the summer?"

"Oh just terribly, Bo," The girl shook her head in disbelief, but there was a hint of a smile on her. She then looked at him with a darkened countenance. "What do you want, hippie?"

"Just wanted to check in on you," the lanky teenager kept his arm around the blonde as he turned his stare towards J.C. "Also, I'm here to collect from a certain someone."

"Fuck, I forgot the money at my place," J.C. cursed as he slapped his forehead. "Can't I just pay you at the party?"

"Fine," Bo replied with a low howl. He then leaned in, his face tightening as he took on a grave expression. "But you better have the money with you tonight, or else I'm gonna have to take your fucking balls or something."

"I'd like to see you do that," Andrea whispered under her breath. The comment didn't go unnoticed by J.C., and the boy gave her a cold look.

Laughing at the scene, Bo then spotted Noel from the corner of his eye. "Oh hey, it's my chem partner. What's up?"

"Nothing much," Noel shrugged. "How about you?"

"You know, just counting down the minutes until we meet again tomorrow," the boy winked at her, causing Noel to blush.

As Noel took a bite out of her pizza, she felt someone tapping her shoulder. Looking behind her, she smiled when she saw that it was Charlie, her friend from earlier.

"Do you mind if I sit with you and your friends, Noel?" Charlie asked nervously. His eyes jumped to each person sitting at the table, and he took the second to nod at each one. "I have no one else to sit with..."

Noel scooted closer to Callie and patted the empty space next to her. "Of course not!"

He let out a relieved breath, happy to not have to sit alone. The dancer thanked her repeatedly as he put his stuff down on the table.

"Everyone this is Charlie," Noel introduced the new kid as he fidgeted in his seat. "He's new, too."

"Hey, Charlie. Where are you from?" Logan smiled from across from Noel. As soon as he had spoken, Charlie locked eyes with the raven-haired boy. Noel arched her eyebrow at the boy. He seemed so concentrated on the other boy's features, as if Logan had placed a spell over him. The girl lightly shoved the smaller boy's shoulder, causing him to snap out of his state.

"Oh, sorry," he mumbled out of embarrassment as he dropped his eyes from Logan's. "I di-didn't catch that."

"It's ok," Logan chuckled, oblivious to what had happened. "I just asked where you're from."

"I just moved here from N.Y.C."

Andrea's eyes widened. "Holy fuck, you're from New York City?"

Charlie glanced over at the girl and recognized her from the pep rally. "Y-yeah. I lived there for a while actually."

"Ugh, I could kill you with envy," Andrea leaned closer into the table, her attention fully focused on the new boy. "It's my dream to see Broadway."

A silly grin broke out on Charlie's face. "You...you like theater?"

"Live and breathe it," the girl admitted with nod. "I'm auditioning for Fantine for our fall production of Les Mis."

"I love theater!" Charlie gushed, happy and excited to find someone who shared those passions of his. "I'm actually a dancer, too, and I love Les Miserables!"

"I think I've found my new soulmate," the girl laughed, causing the boy to once again blush. A smirk painted on her face, the blonde pointed a finger at J.C. "Switch places with Charlie."

The two switched places, and as Andrea and Charlie entered into animated conversation about Broadway, J.C. bit his bottom lip as a thought entered his head. Feeling frisky, the boy pretended to stretch out his limbs while sensually rubbing his foot against Logan's calf. He kept it up until he got the reaction that he wanted from the flustered boy.

"There you are, McGuire," an energetic voice spoke out, causing everyone to stop their conversations as Alex Taylor approached Bo with Stella trailing behind. "I've been looking all over for you, asshole."

Bo turned around and smiled at the girl. "You've finally found me! Cheers, Alex!"

"Can we go somewhere to do business? I'm in need of party favors for tonight," the girl lightly punched him in the arm. While she was in high spirits, her friend was visibly agitated. Her eyes squinted together in order to create a dark look, she scanned the people at the table, her hands firmly placed on her hips.

Bo exhaled sharply. Even though he didn't want to leave, he couldn't say no to one of his best clients. Removing his arm from around Andrea, he picked up the blonde's hand before kissing it.

"Mademoiselle, always the pleasure," he chirped before standing up. The boy then captured Noel's gaze. "And until tomorrow partner."

He and Alex then made their way outside the cafeteria. Stella, however, stayed put. She perked up when she recognized Noel as the girl who had caused the scene in her chemistry class, the one responsible for her now being able to work closely with Kendall for the duration of the semester. Taking a few steps forward, Stella flicked an eyebrow at the girl, her arms wrapping around her stomach while she jutted out her hip.

"You're the one who caused the commotion in chem earlier?" she pointed at Noel with a delicate finger.

The girl turned away with a shy smile. "I wouldn't necessarily call it a commotion, but...yeah...that was me."

Stella glanced over at Andrea and smirked at the blonde before turning back to thank Noel.

"Either way I'm glad you did it. I'm looking forward to all the extra time I'll be spending with Kendall now. He's simply my favorite, and I'm sure he's just as excited to be working so _intimately _with me."

The girl spun on her heels and stole another glance at the fuming Andrea. Satisfied that she was able to get under the girl's skin, Stella laughed to herself before leaving to go find Alex right as the bell rang, signaling the end of the lunch period.

Without uttering a word to anyone, Andrea gathered her purse and headed for the girl's washroom, while J.C. and Callie said their goodbyes to everyone before heading to their lockers.

"Were you still going to come to the mall with us after school?" Elizabeth asked Logan while securing her camera around her neck. The boy shook his head 'yes', causing the girl to smile. The blonde then turned to Noel. "You can come, too."

Flattered by the offer, Noel shook her head 'no.' "I'm sorry, but I've got a bunch of homework to do tonight."

Elizabeth shot the girl an incredulous stare. "Seriously? On the first day already?"

Noel gulped and let out a nervous laugh. "Y-yeah, you know how it is. Don't want to get behind, that's all."

"Forget about it," Elizabeth waved her hand as if she were swatting at the notion. "You should totally come! It'll be a lot of fun."

Realizing that the girl wasn't going to take no for an answer, Noel sighed. "I'll think about it."

"Cool," Elizabeth smiled before grabbing her lunch bag. "Hope to see you later then."

As the girl darted away, Noel and Logan grabbed their things and walked off together, leaving Charlie alone at the table by himself. He had hoped that he would have been invited, too, but alas, there would be no invitation for him. His eyes downfallen, he gave up on his meal and decided to go to his next class, knowing that he'll probably spend the full period thinking about his newfound crush.

Having discovered that they both had their next class in the same wing, Noel and Logan walked side by side.

"So," Logan asked as they tried their best to navigate through the crowded hallways, "why don't you wanna come out with us after school?"

"I-I don't know," Noel struggled to speak, her words getting lodged inside her throat. "I just don't feel like it."

"You should come with us," Logan replied, his tone stern as if he was commanding her to go rather than encouraging her to.

"I don't know, Logan."

The two came to a complete stop once they were outside Logan's classroom. With only two minutes before the bell rang, the boy gently guided Noel towards the lockers to talk with her.

"Look, I know from Kendall that things aren't great, but you can't avoid avoid us anymore now," Logan spoke softly. "We all go to the same school now, and we'll be seeing each other every day. You can't cut us off, so please stop trying to. Go back to how things used to be. It's for the best."

Noel looked to be taken aback by his words. Logan wondered if maybe he had been too forward with his approach. However, it felt good to get that off his chest. Summer had been too long and too miserable for his best friend because of her, and he didn't understand why she was being so cruel.

Logan rubbed the back of his neck as he waited for Noel to respond, but her response never came. Instead, the bell rang, indicating that there conversation was moot.

Sighing in defeat, the boy gave the girl one last hopeful look. "Just think about it ok? We'll be in the back parking lot after school."

He then left Noel behind, leaving her alone to her thoughts. Her hands tightened into fists as she backed up against the lockers. She slowly fell to the ground, her back sliding against the metallic surface until she was in a sitting position. Drawing her knees to her chest, the girl buried her head into her lap, not caring that she was missing class.

* * *

Noel slammed her locker shut. She banged her head against the metal door and exhaled exasperatedly, her eyes closing tightly in an effort to drown out the day's events. After lunch, the rest of her day had been pretty uneventful. She ended up having a class with both Elizabeth and Logan, and while she purposely didn't talk to them much, they were friendly. She could handle people like Elizabeth and Logan; it were people like Andrea French who she couldn't tolerate.

She decided to leave her backpack in her locker. Although she had homework for tomorrow, she didn't feel like doing it tonight. She groaned inwardly as she thought about how she was going to be behind already. It was easy work, but she didn't have the will to do it. All she wanted to do was crawl into bed and hide from the world for the rest of the day. And maybe she'd even take another pill, even though she was only down to two. She earned it after a day like this.

Heading to the front parking lot, the blonde girl shoved her way through the dense crowd of teenagers that congregated in the hallway. She decided that she would walk home today, mainly because she didn't know if her grandfather was going to pick her up after his shift ended. As she stepped outside, she came to a screeching halt as she spotted Kendall coming towards her from the parking lot, a duffle bag with his hockey gear over his shoulder.

"Fuck," the girl harshly hissed while running a hand through her hair. Spinning on her heels, the girl snuck back into the school, and although she tried to slip by without being noticed, she could hear him calling out for her.

His tone sent her body into overdrive, and her frantic pace increased as she sought refuge further within the school. She would look over her shoulder every once in a while in order to see if he was still chasing her. Her unstable mind was playing tricks on her; sometimes she would see him, and sometimes she wouldn't. It left her anxious, and she no longer was paying attention to her surroundings. While once again looking over her shoulder, she unexpectedly bumped into someone, and the crash was enough to snap her out of her daze.

Keeping her eyes to the ground, Noel muttered a barely audible apology.

"Hey, Noel! Where are you off to in such a rush?"

The sound of the voice was familiar, but the ex-dancer had trouble figuring out who it belonged to. Lifting her eyes from the ground, Noel was surprised to see Elizabeth smiling at her with a camera around her neck.

"S-sorry," Noel stuttered, embarrassment taking over as she began to feel self-conscious. "I wasn't paying attention."

"Clearly," Elizabeth laughed cordially, her eyes twinkling with a friendliness that made Noel feel a little more relaxed. Noel returned the grin before moving past Elizabeth.

"You have any plans for today?" Elizabeth's voice pierced through the hallway.

Noel turned around and shrugged at her. "No. Just going home."

"Cool, how about you join us then?" the brown eyed girl invited, the warm smile on her face still sparkling bright.

Noel dug her hands into her pockets and sighed. "Thanks, but I don't know if that's a good idea."

"Nonsense," Elizabeth waved her hand in the air, as if to reprimand her for thinking that way. "The more the merrier. Plus Logan really wants you to tag along."

"I don't-"

Elizabeth stepped forward, interrupting the girl in mid-sentence. "Come on. You know you want to. Plus, it'll help you get to know everyone better. We're a friendly bunch, really."

Noel turned around to hide her smirk. However, the look didn't go unnoticed by Elizabeth.

"I'm not taking no for an answer, Noel."

Closing her eyes, Noel let out a sigh and cocked her head to the side. She studied the expression on Elizabeth's face, and she could tell that the girl really wasn't going to take no for an answer.

"What the hell," Noel caved in, shaking her head in disbelief.

"That's the spirit," Elizabeth giggled while interlocking arms with Noel. She wore a victorious grin on her face, happy that her plan had succeeded. The good girl knew that Andrea would probably be angry at her, but it was a price she was willing to pay. After all, she was doing this for her best friend, doing this in order to prove to Andrea that Noel wasn't a threat.

As the two walked down the hallway together, Noel blanked out for a minute while Elizabeth went on about how she had just finished taking some pictures of the first day of school for the yearbook. She was too consumed with her own thoughts, her own worries. She tried to conceal them with fake interest, and she was hoping that she was coming off genuine.

Noel didn't want Elizabeth to know that the only reason she had agreed was because she had spotted Kendall from across the hall.

* * *

For the past twenty minutes, no one spoke in the car. The silence would have been unbearable if it weren't for The Spice Girls playlist that was being blasted from Callie's iPhone. They were parked in the back of a lot that belonged to a liquor store that was two towns away; when Andrea had revealed that they had to get the alcohol for tonight, they figured it would be best to go to a store far from home. Also the word on the street was that the owner sometimes forgot to card people, making their chances of success even better.

The new girl felt anxious sitting in the car, and she could no longer take it.

"I don't want to sound impatient, but are we going to go in or not?"

Callie nodded her head in agreement. "I still say we just not go to the party. Honestly, do we need to get drunk on a Monday night?"

"We're going to the party," Andrea informed coldly from the front seat. "For fuck's sake, don't being so bleak."

Frustrated with her friend's tone, Callie freed herself from her seatbelt in order to move to the edge of her seat.

"Then what you waiting for, Andrea?" the girl huffed. "Why don't you and J.C. go in then? After all, you two are the only ones drinking here."

"They're waiting for a miracle to happen," Logan mumbled from the back of the car. He then lurched forward when he felt Elizabeth's hand smack into his chest.

"A miracle?" Callie mocked the boy's tone. "As in Jesus coming down to turn water into cherry flavored vodka?"

J.C. threw his hands in the air. "I-I can't do this. I'm not going in there with my fake. If we get busted, I can get into serious trouble."

"You've said that you've used it a bunch of times," Andrea spoke harshly, her eyes darting daggers at the panicked boy.

"Only at clubs and bars and other places where I could fuck the bouncer as a last resort! Plus, you've seen it! It's shit! The guy on it is Mexican!"

"You're such a pussy, J.C.," Andrea cried as she buried her face into her hands.

"Then why don't you man up, Andrea!" the blond yelled, his eyes burning with frustration. "Go in there and flash the clerk your tits!"

The girl's expression cooled intensely as she darted her eyes at him. "There's only one many who gets to see my tits, and it's not some pedo creep in charge of a liquor store."

"You know," let's just go to the mall then," Elizabeth spoke up as the peacemaker of the group. "Callie's right anyway. We don't need to party tonight. Let's just get dinner or go see a movie."

"I'm with Elizabeth on this one," Logan added, and Callie turned around to thank the two for agreeing with her.

To everyone's surprise, Noel threw open her door and stepped out onto the pavement.

"Noel, what are you doing?" Logan asked forcefully, the look on his face screaming for her to get back into the car.

"What does it look like I'm doing, Logan?" The blonde clapped her hands together. "I'm man-ing up, so which one of you little girls is coming with?"

No one spoke, and Noel groaned at how they were reacting. It was funny how they could talk the talk, yet when the opportunity finally came for them to do it, they couldn't walk the walk. Running a hand through her hair, Noel smirked as an idea popped into her head.

"Andrea, you're an actress right? So, all you have to do is to play the part of a 21 year old."

The thespian pondered over what Noel had said. Letting out a nervous breath, the girl opened her car door and stepped outside.

"Have you done this before?"

Noel nodded. "Yeah, a couple of times back in Boston. Trust me, no guy is going to card two girls."

Andrea placed one hand on her hip and the other one on her forehead as she thought through everything once again. After a few seconds to herself, she finally caved in and closed the car door.

"Let's do this quick, ok?" the girl's voice jumped a few octaves, her nerves at an all time high.

The ex-dancer nodded, surprised that she was able to coax Andrea that easily. Noel tilted her head to the store, and the two girls left the car with Andrea following Noel. As the girls got closer to the store, J.C. rolled down his window and whistled, capturing the girls' attention.

"If he asks for I.D., just whip out your jugs!"

Andrea flicked him off as Noel rushed to open the door. As the two girls entered the building, an older gentlemen in a baseball cap greeted them with a faint hello from behind the counter. Noel nodded in response, while Andrea offered her own greeting, her voice shaky and uneven.

"You have the money right?" Noel asked as they made their way down a random aisle.

"Y-yeah," Andrea replied lightly as she dug her hands into the pockets of her coat. "It's all with me."

"Cool," Noel ran a finger across her jaw as she looked at the different bottles of liquor. "So, what are you supposed to get?"

While Noel was busy looking at different types of vodka, Andrea spun around and meandered towards the wine section. Her fingers brushed along the different bottles until she found her favorite one. Tapping it for good look, the girl returned to Noel with the wine in hand.

"I'll drink this."

Noel arched her eyebrow in an unexpected fashion. "Pink Moscato? You drink wine at parties?"

"I do, and sometimes Elizabeth does," Andrea explained in a faint whisper. "It's less calories than mixed drinks."

"Ok," Noel shrugged. "To each their own, I guess. What else?"

Andrea spotted a particular bottle in the adjacent aisle. Noel followed the girl and stood to the side as Andrea got on her knees to select an expensive whiskey.

"Kendall says he likes this."

"That stuff's way too expensive," Noel shook her head and smirked at the girl. Noel glanced over her shoulder and found a cheaper brand of whiskey, one that was more economically sound for teenagers who just wanted to get trashed on a random night of the week.

"This will do," Noel added in a hushed tone, worried that the store clerk was getting suspicious of them. "Trust me, Kendall won't even be able to tell that it's a different brand."

Andrea starred at the bottle in her hands. She had wanted to do something special for Kendall, but if she got, there wouldn't be enough money for anything else. She gently placed the bottle back and pushed herself off the ground.

"How much money do you in total?" Noel asked as she returned to the previous aisle.

"Fifty dollars," Andrea answered while brushing the wrinkles out of her clothes.

"Nice," Noel nodded. She grabbed two bottles of incredibly cheap vodka, one of them even tasted like sour apple. She then walked back towards Andrea and showed her what she had found. "I think we're ready to pay now."

Her face blanking, Andrea placed a hand on her stomach and took a deep breath. "Time to get into character then."

What happened next caught Noel completely off guard, almost causing her to drop the bottles. The actress closed her eyes and took in inhaled largely. Then she started making a weird noise while shaking out her hands.

It took all of four seconds before Noel placed her bottles on the ground and grabbed a hold of Andrea's arm, ceasing her from her acting exercise.

"What the fuck are you doing?" the new girl hissed in an octave that was slightly above a whisper, her eyes moving back and forth between Andrea and the man behind the counter.

"T-that was an acting exercise," Andrea blinked. "It's supposed to help with getting into character."

"Well cut it out, _Meryl_. You're drawing attention!"

With one last glare, Noel dropped the girl's arm and scooped up the bottles from the ground. Taking a deep breath, the two made their way to the counter, both of their hearts beating at whirlwind rates. A sudden urge of confidence flowed through Andrea's veins.

"Follow my lead," the girl purred slyly into Noel's ear as the two girls placed the bottles onto the counter.

As the older man started to ring up each bottle, Andrea leaned onto the counter and titled her head to the side, a seductive grin planted firmly on her made-up face.

"Hi cutie," the girl batted her eyelids and turned up her feminine charm, "how are you doing this afternoon?"

The man paused what he was doing and arched an eyebrow at the girl. "I'm gonna need to see some I.D."

Andrea sobered up instantly, her posture returning to normal. "U-um, pardon, sir?"

"Identification?" the man chided arrogantly, his eyes skipping over to Noel. "Proof that you and your friend are both 21, _cutie_."

Andrea gulped, her bluff no longer working. She turned to look at Noel, praying that the girl had a trick up her sleeve. However, as the new girl stayed silent, Andrea felt her heart drop, her blood turning cold at the realization that they were treading in some serious waters now.

"O-oh yeah," the blonde haired beauty added, her tone overly confident. She began to pat her pockets. "Let me see...I've got to have it here somewhere..."

"Excuse me, sir, but there's smoke coming out from there," Noel pointed to a microwave that was tucked away in a room behind the counter.

"Huh?" The man let out a bewildered cry and turned around, providing the girls the perfect escape route.

With his back turned, Noel acted on impulse and scooped up all of the bottles.

"Peg it!" the girl commanded through clenched teeth.

At first, Andrea didn't know what Noel meant, but she quickly caught on when Noel broke out into a run. The pretty girl let out a startled scream as she struggled to keep pace in her high heels. Hearing the commotion, the store owner slammed his fist onto the counter when he realized that the girls had run off.

"Those mother fuckers," he cursed. He attempted to jump over the counter, but his foot didn't quite make it over, causing him to violently collide with the floor. The blow knocked the air out of him for a second, but when he came to, he pushed himself off the ground, his rage at an ungodly level.

"You bitches get back here before I call the cops!"

He dashed outside, but the girls weren't there.

They had escaped.

* * *

As J.C. drove away, the car was filled with a ruckus that was at an ear-shattering decibel. Noel and J.C. were screaming in victory, both completely high off the adrenaline that was pumping through their bodies because of the chase. Everyone else, however, was in a state of panic. Callie and Logan were yelling to turn around, while Elizabeth was screaming at J.C. to slow down. The only one who didn't contribute to the noise was Andrea, who was on the verge of a nervous breakdown.

"That was fucking insane!" J.C. shrieked.

"Andrea, are you ok?" Elizabeth called out from the back.

"Y-yeah," Andrea coughed out, her lungs not able to pull in enough oxygen. "I-I just need to catch my breath."

Logan shoved Noel's shoulder. "What the hell were you thinking, Noel?"

"Relax, Logie," the blonde girl cooed softly. She was still riding off her adrenaline high, and there was no way she was coming down from it. "We're going to be fine."

"We have to go back!" he snapped back. "We have t-to go back before the cops come after us."

"That's not going to happen," Noel retorted with confident smirk. "He has no idea who we are. The only way we'll get caught is if we actually _do_ go back now."

Logan shook his head, refusing to compromise his moral integrity. "This isn't right."

Callie sighed lowly, nodding her head in agreement. "I agree, but the girl has a point."

"Fuck all that," J.C. roared from the driver's seat. "What you did back there, Noel, was like straight up from a video game. I'm insanely impressed."

A moment of silence then fell over everyone. No one spoke a word. The only sound made was the sound of everyone's heavy breathing, and after a while, Noel found herself laughing for no reason whatsoever. Callie, Logan, and Elizabeth looked at her strangely as she continued to let out a high pitch laugh, and soon enough the three of them joined in on the laughter. It was so strange and surreal, but the atmosphere was contagious. When J.C. joined in, the only person not laughing was Andrea.

Looking over her seat, Andrea watched sadly as her friends joked around with Noel. When the sight became too unbearable, she turned to stare out her window.

* * *

From the third floor of the mall, Andrea sadly watched the people below her as she tossed french fries over the guard rail. People would give look up at her, and the looks on their faces varied. Some gave her confused stares, while others glared at her. There were some who even yelled at her for hitting them, but that didn't stop her deter her one bit. She shouldn't have bought the fries in the first place. If she had ate them, she would have to go on the treadmill for an extra hour to burn off the calories. Plus, the fat would go straight to her already huge thighs.

Sighing to herself, the girl whimpered delicately as loneliness stirred within her. A part of her wanted to rejoin her friends, but they were having fun with _her_. The new girl. Andrea cringed at the thought of Noel. She didn't get what the big deal was about her, or why her friends were taking such a strong liking to her.

She didn't get why her boyfriend was so wound up about her earlier.

The blonde started to feel sick to her stomach. Why hadn't Kendall spoken about her before? Was she really someone important to him? Andrea hated to admit it, but she felt jealous. There was obviously a deep connection between them, and it was impossible to ignore this earlier when she saw them together.

Andrea tossed the rest of the fries over the ledge and watched as the container landed on the ground with light thud. She had eaten two french fries, which would meant that she would have to cut back on dinner.

The thought made her feel even more self-conscious, more insecure about herself. Trying to distract herself, the girl pulled out her cell phone and groaned at the time. It had been almost an hour since she had left the group at the arcade, yet none of them seemed to have noticed her absence. The emptiness that she felt grew.

The blonde then checked to see if she had any new text messages. She only had one unread message from an unknown number. Opening it, she smiled brightly to herself as she read the text message from her younger brother, Chase.

_Hello Andi. This Chase from ym new fone lol. See you tonite! _

She quickly typed out a response and saved the new contact to her phonebook. As she placed the device back into her coat pocket, someone came up from behind and placed their hands over her eyes.

"Peek-a-boo, Andi-poo," Elizabeth greeted playfull before pulling her hands away. She then spotted the mess below them, and her demeanor suddenly changed.

"Is something the matter?"

Andrea shrugged her shoulders, not bothering to answer her friend. From the corner of her eye, she could see the deep concern written over Elizabeth's face.

"I'm fine, El. Stop you're worrying."

"You didn't..."

Andrea snapped towards Elizabeth and shook her head forcefully. "I didn't. I haven't done that in ages, El. I promise."

Elizabeth nodded in response. Although her friend had denied her suspicion, she still didn't feel totally at ease. She knew when there was something troubling her best friend.

"So I have nothing to worry about?" the girl asked while raising an eyebrow in doubt.

Andrea forced a smile onto her face. "Nope. Not a single thing. So, where is everyone?"

"They're still at the arcade."

Andrea rolled her eyes at the news. "Let me guess. Basking in how awesome Noel is?"

"She's not bad, Andrea," Elizabeth retorted sternly. "You haven't exactly given her chance, now have you?"

The girl laughed at the comment before leaning into her friend. "Sorry I'm selective about the people I chose to associate with."

"Has anyone ever told you before that sometimes you say things that make you sound like a complete bitch?" Elizabeth smirked in a joking manner.

Andrea lightly nudged an elbow into her friend's side. "Have you not met my mother?"

The two girls shared a laugh before they spotted Logan searching for them. Andrea waved to catch his attention, and when he spotted the blondes, a goofy grin spread across his lips as he made his way towards them with Callie, J.C., and Noel behind him.

"Hey skinny bitch," J.C. winked as he placed himself on the other side of Andrea. "Missed you."

"Missed you, too, slut," Andrea purred seductively, causing the taller boy to chuckle at her. A genuine smile finally returning to her face, the tall blonde clapped her hands together. "So, what do we do now?"

Callie cocked her head slightly to the side. "Um, hello? Us girls have outfits to sort for tonight. Isn't that right, Noel?"

"E-excuse me?" the new girl spoke while avoiding eye contact with Andrea.

"That party we were talking about earlier," J.C. clarified with a light nod directed at Noel. "You're tagging along with us, right?"

"I don't...I don't know...I wasn't invited..."

"You're invited now," Callie giggled while placing a reassuring hand on Noel's shoulder. "I hate going to these things, so I'm going to need someone to be my sobber buddy for tonight."

"Hey! I don't get sloppy, _Calypso,_" Elizabeth interjected from the sidelines.

"Yeah, but you're always attached to Logan, so whatever," Callie rolled her eyes in a lighthearted manner before capturing Noel's attention. "So what do you say, Noel? Are you in?"

Noel glanced around at everyone. They all looked encouraging except for Andrea. Unlike her friends, she was trying to conceal her disgust. Noel decided to no longer pay her any attention.

"Sure. I'll go."

The response earned a round of applause from everyone but Andrea. She turned her head towards Elizabeth and shot the girl an annoyed look. Elizabeth countered with a stare that warned her friend to be nice.

Sighing to herself, Andrea shook her head in defeat.

"Not to be a drag," the actress intruded with a passive aggressive tone aimed at Noel, "but, um, we should really get our outfits sorted out now. Some of us are in a dire need of a new attire. No offense."

With a tiny giggle that no one else returned, Andrea spun on her heels and began walking towards her favorite mall boutiqe.

"Hurry up, guys!" she called out from behind her shoulder.

Elizabeth, Callie, and J.C. immeidately went to her, while Logan and Noel stayed behind. The dancer was still reeling over the latest dig from Andrea.

"See, she isn't _that_ bad," Logan chuckled faintly as Noel squirmed at the comment.

"Whatever you say, Logan," the girl chided with fake amusement.

The ravenhaired genius sighed and slipped an arm around Noel's shoulder.

"Let's find you something nice to wear," Logan grinned as the two trailled behind everyone else.

* * *

"How's it going in there, Noel?" Elizabeth asked from behind the dressing room curtain.

As soon as the words left Elizabeth's mouth, Noel drew the curtain back and revealed herself to Elizabeth, Callie, and Andrea.

"I don't like this," the girl admitted as she stood there uncomfrotably in a dress that wasn't _her_. She was wearing a strapless minidress that was covered in golden sequences and that exposed a lot of skin, a lot more than what she was willing to show off. "I look stupid, guys."

Andrea took offense to the comment, as she had selected the dress for Noel to try on. "What? Like me, you mean?"

Even though that's exactly how she felt, Noel shook her head 'no.' "It's just...not my style. Sorry."

"Fair enough. Let's look for something that is then," Callie offered with a simple nod. She leaned forward and grabbed a hold of Noel's arm, dragging the blonde out from the dressing room. "After all, you gotta look your best if you want to impress that guy that you were talking about."

Andrea's eyes narrowed in on Noel. "What guy?"

Before Noel could respond, Callie began to speak for her. "Just some guy that Noel finds cute."

"What's his name then?" Andrea retorted in an icy voice, causing Elizabeth and Callie to look at her oddly.

Noel eagerly shook her head. "It's not what you think."

Sensing the tension between the two blondes, Callie decided to intervene. "Is there a problem here?"

"No," Noel quickly answered while grabbing onto Callie's arm. "L-let's go find something else, ok?"

Andrea's cold stare followed as Noel dragged Callie to a nearby clothes rack. Elizabeth joined the two, and the three girls started to converse animatedly. Stepping into the dressing room, the blonde took a final glance at the three before closing the drape.

J.C. tapped his foot impatiently as he fished for a cigarette from his pocket.

"Got a lighter?" he asked Logan, flicking a suggestive brow at him.

The shorter boy gave him a questioning glance. "Don't think you're allowed to smoke inside, _friend_."

J.C. tensed his shoulders, the corner of his lips turning into a cool grin. "Don't give a fuck. I want a smoke."

Leaning further against the guard rail, Logan admired the boy standing next to him fondly. He watched with heavy eyes as J.C. patted himself down in an attempt to find where he had placed his lighter. The bruntte subtly licked his lips as his eyes wandered to the cigarette that dangled from J.C.'s lips. Breaking free from the spell, Logan smirked as a thought crossed his mind.

"Let me help you with that," the boy offered innocently with an air of naughtiness. J.C.'s girations stilled when he felt Logan's hand caress his chest. The blonde marvelled at the sensation as the smaller teenager dragged his hand down towards his pants, causing J.C. to exhale very rapidly. Before he could protest, the brunette suddenly changed his direction at the last minute and dug his hand into the blonde's coat pocket.

"Found it," Logan grinned cheakily while dangling the lighter in front of J.C.

It took a moment for the taller teenager to reign in his hormones, which were making it impossible for him to be mad at Logan for pulling off such a bold move in public. Taking a deep breath, J.C. quickly snatched the lighter from him.

"Bastard," the blonde chastized venomously, but the reprimand was counteracted by his mischevious grin.

The shorter boy chuckled before nudging into J.C.'s side. They stayed like that for a brief second before pulling away from each other when they picked up on the girls' voice from behind. Both boys turned around and noticed that the girls had finished paying for their outfits. As usual, Andrea and Callie had multiple bags, while Elizabeth had a tiny bag for a piece of jewelry that she liked. Noel was the only one without a bag, having ultimately not found anythign that she liked.

As the girls made their way to the store's exit, they each had to pass through a shoplifting detector. Andrea went through and nothing happened. Callie was next, and nothing happened. Elizabeth went, and once again nothing happened. Then Noel went through, and the alarm went off.

Elizabeth and Callie whipped around, their eyes widening while Noel remained in place like a deer in headlights. Logan and J.C. moved towards the group, and Andrea took advantage and hid behind them.

Noel felt her knees buckle as a wave of adrenaline swept through her. The alarm pierced through her ear drum, leaving her unable to think properly. This obviously had to be faulty; she had nothing on her.

A security guard from inside the store came and tapped a pudgy finger against the confused girl's shoulder. "Miss, I'm going to need to see what's in your pockets."

Noel whipped her head back. "Wh-what?"

"You need to empty your pockets now."

Logan glanced at the group of teenagers. They were all cowering away from Noel, all of them trying to look as if they werne't associated with her as a crowd gathered around to watch the scene unfold. The raven-haired boy decided to speak up.

"S-sir, this has to be some kind of mistake," Logan stuttered apprehensively. He then felt a lump form in his throat as the security guard turned and narrowed his eyes at him. The look silenced Logan, and the teenager stepped back

The security guard then returned his impatient stare to Noel. "Miss, I don't got all day."

Noel looked around at the teenagers who had been friendly with her earlier. None of them would look her in the eye, and she felt a bit of anger swell within her. Biting her bottom lip, the girl casted her head to the ground and dug her hands into her pockets. When she did, she unexpectedly felt her fingers clasp around a metallic chain.

The way her eyes widned gave everything away.

"That's what I thought," the security placed his hands on Noel's shoulders, his strong hold preventing her from being able to run off. "You're coming with me."

"I don't know how it got there," Noel rushed to explain, panic taking over. "I swear! I wasn't trying to steal!"

"Sure thing, Winona Ryder," the security guard laughed as he forecefully guided her to the back of the store. As she was pushed away, Noel snapped her head to send one last pleading look to the group.

"Guys! I didn't do anything!" the girl cried hysterically, her voice loud and trembling. "Do something! Help!"

Despite her cries, no one came to her aid. Instead, they kept their eyes everywhere but at her. They pretended to no longer know her, and Noel go the message loud and clear. She knew they'd be trouble, that they'd let her down, yet she went along with them anyway. Shame on her for being so trusting.

* * *

Noel wore a brave face, but her Stoicism was nothing more than a bluff. Inside she was unraveling at the seams, the aftershocks from her latest earthquake causing her to crumble. To whoever's credit, she got off with nothing more than a slap on the wrist and was told by the shopkeeper to never enter her boutique again. These were things that she could have gotten over in a day or two. However, the trauma would be permanently etched into her due to the fact that the mall cop had to call her in her mother.

The two Greene women remained deathly silent as Mrs. Greene drove home. She had said little when she came to pick her up, but her body language revealed that she was keeping her wrath at bay.

Having decided to sit in the back seat, Noel kept her eyes glued to her window, watching as the scenery flew past her. They were driving through her neighborhood, through the place that she had grown up in, and she now realized how hollow it all appeared. There was no longer that magic, no longer those attachments that made her feel connected to the place. She had a sudden urge to leave, a sudden urge to go back to Boston, even though it was a burial ground for her shattered life.

From the corner of her eye, Noel caught her mother sending her glances through the rear view window. She ignored them at first, but after a while they drove her wild.

"You going to say anything, mom?" the young girl quipped in a purposely bratty tone, her body still directed towards the window in an uninviting way. "Or are you going to keep giving me the stink eye?"

"What do you want me to say, Noel?" Mrs. Greene bit her bottom lip and slammed her foot on the parking break, causing both women to lurch forward a little. When the car came to a complete stop on the side of the road in a residential neighborhood, the mother of two flung her seat belt off and twisted in her seat in order to reveal how visibly disappointed she was in her daughter.

"What do you want me to say, huh? That I'm proud of you? That I'm abso-fucking-lutely happy that you're starting the school year off with a bang!"

The young girl refused to look at her mother. "I was framed by that bitch Andrea! I know she did it."

Mrs. Greene blinked as she weighed the validity of her daughter's response. "That may be true, but you have to understand that there could have been some serious consequences, Noel. Do you even realize how lucky you are that you didn't get into any real trouble?"

"Oh shut," Noel snapped in a hushed tone, hoping that her disrespect would go unnoticed. Unfortunately for her, it didn't.

"I'm getting really sick of the attitude, Noel," Mrs. Greene raged with frustration, having finally reached the end of her wits. This was no longer just about her daughter's recent delinquent behavior; this breakdown was a long time coming, and to be fair, Noel was unfairly being subjugated to an explosion that was also meant for people who weren't in the car with her.

"I'm getting fucking sick of it all! I am trying my best to make everything work, Noel. You can't keep doing this to me! It isn't fair. It isn't all my fault."

"I'm not doing this now," Noel whimpered, her throat constricting as she fought down a sob. She needed an escape, a way to finally free herself from this mess, but her mother kept on speaking.

"Then when are we going to do this?" her mother demanded. "When are we going to actually talk, Noel? You never come out of your room anymore!"

"Maybe it's because I don't want to deal with everything behind it." The girl paused to wipe a tear away from her eye. Taking a deep breath, Noel forced herself to look at her mother for the first time. "You know, you're not the only one hurting, mom. You're not the only one who lost something important."

Mrs. Green was taken aback by her daughter's confession, and her expression softened. "I-I'm sorry that I lost the studio, Noel. I'm sorry a-about your father, and I-I'm sorry that everything has turned to crap for you and your brother."

Noel's hand clutched for the car door handle. She squeezed it tightly only to find that the door was locked.

"I'm done with this, mom. Unlock the door now!"

"You can blame me forever, if you'd like," her mother cooed softly, her heart finally breaking as she watched her daughter desperately claw at the locked door, "but you can't keep doing what you're doing. You can't take it out on everyone else who's trying to help. People love you, Noel. Your brother, your grandfather, your friends...Kendall...we all love you so much."

Noel stopped what she was doing in order growl at her mother.

"If you're not going to unlock the fucking door, then can you please just drive!"

The words came out harsher than she had intended, but Noel got her desired outcome once the color finally drained from her mother's face. The older woman's hands shook uncontrollably as she moved the car out of park. Noel watched her mother's movements with clouded eyes, and she was struck by how different they looked. They weren't as youthful as she had remembered; they were more weathered, more abused. The sight made her feel nauseous.

This distance between her and her mother...how she wished for things to change, for things to be different.

Settling in her seat, she closed her eyes in an attempt to block everything out, but she was unable to. She could hear her mother trying to conceal her sobs, and it took every nerve in her to stop herself from throwing up.

* * *

Noel was fighting a losing battle against her emotions. Her hands quivered as she removed the chain with her bedroom key on it from around her neck. She struggled to calm herself down, making it nearly impossible to place the key into the lock. However, when she finally managed to, she was startled to find that the door was already unlocked. A thousand fears plagued her as she pushed the door open. As soon as she recognized who was in her room though, her anxiety evaporated, leaving behind a tingle that left her skin crawling with agitation.

"What are you doing in here?"

Kendall turned around lazily, not fazed at all by the girls' visible distress. "Nice room. Bit messy, but hey, life's too short to be organized, right?"

Noel quickly looked over her shoulder. Seeing that no one was around her, she closed the door shut before stomping towards him.

"How the fuck did you get in here?" the girl demanded. She was on edge, but she knew that she had to keep her cool. After all, what if he had found her pills? What secrets could he have dug up on her?

"I have my ways," Kendall chuckled in an attempt to bring humor into the situation. "Seriously though, your grandmother let me in."

"How'd she do that? I always have the door locked."

The tall boy took a step towards her. "It's her house. She had a spare key."

Noel brought a hand to her forehead and exhaled deeply. She hadn't thought that there would be a spare lying about when she stole the key earlier in the summer. With her gone now for school, her room would no longer safe. In fact, how had her grandmother reacted when she let Kendall into the room? With everything in such disarray...

Picking up on the girl's anguish, Kendall eased closer towards her and placed his larger hands on top of her shoulders, squeezing them gently.

"You need to relax, Noel. You look like you're going to snap."

Noel's eyes travelled to his hands. She savored the feeling of his hands on her, but that was just for a moment. When it passed, she shook his grip off her.

"I can't relax because no one will leave me the fuck alone," the girl griped bitterly as she threw herself onto her bed. "Oh, and by the way, you're girlfriend is a fucking nightmare!"

Kendall immediately grew tense, his stare darkening as he sat himself next to noel.

"What did Andrea do?"

"Doesn't matter what she did," Noel groaned before falling backwards onto her bare mattress. She buried her hands into her face and let out a muffled scream, one that sent a shiver down Kendall's spine. He wanted to comfort her, but he didn't know what to do, what to say to make things better.

Noel dropped her hands before rolling onto her side. From this position, she was able to stare at Kendall, their eyes finding each other in an awkward hold.

"I can't believe you picked _her_," Noel criticized cynically. She had reached her boiling point, and she wasn't going to suppress the explosions that were taking place inside of her. "Seriously, how could you fall for a girl like her? The Kendall I knew wouldn't even think twice of being with someone like Andrea French!"

To her surprise, Kendall didn't recoil at her words. Instead, they acted like gasoline to his flames, sending him into a blaze of furry.

"That's the thing, Noel," Kendall chuckled darkly before shaking his head in disbelief over her. Unbeknownst to her, Kendall had his own explosions, his own damage that was taken a toll on him.

The teenager threw himself off the bed. He began to massage the back of his neck as he carefully chose the words that he was going to use next.

""You don't know me anymore! You don't know a single _fucking_ thing, and that's because you decided to hide in here all summer."

"Here we go!" Noel laughed tiredly as she propped herself onto her elbows. "Lay it on me, Kendall! Tell me just how much I've fucked things up for you!"

"Jesus fucking Christ, Noel!" Kendall stomped his foot irritatedly, his face taking on a measured look. "What the fuck happened to you? You and I...I thought we had a chance."

Noel's heart skipped a beat. "You...you what?"

"I thought we had a chance," Kendall repeated in a soft murmur. His face reddened in embarrassment, but he decided to carry on, to continue with pouring out his heart. "We talked about it, right? Joked about it a bunch of times, but guess what? I wasn't joking."

He paused to collect his breath. "When I heard that you were coming back, I was excited because I thought things would work out, you know? But I guess I was wrong, huh? I'm sorry for caring, Noel. If you want to be left alone, fine. I'll stop chasing after you."

Without waiting for her to speak, Kendall turned his gaze away from her and headed towards the door. If he hadn't been too lost inside his head, he would have heard Noel calling his name, begging for him to stay. Instead, he slammed the door behind him.

Noel could hear his footsteps echo as he raced down the staircase, and the sound of them was enough to break her. The tears that she had been trying to push back rolled down her face.

Reaching into her drawer, she pulled out the plastic baggie and popped in a pill before passing out on her bed.

* * *

That pill really fucked up Noel good. It was like a bullet to the brain, obliterating everything that she was feeling. She became lost in a blanket of warmth that had enveloped her body, rocking her into a steady state of ecstasy.

In nothing more than just her bra and underwear, Noel turned on her iTunes and found a song to play. As the angry tempo filled the room, the emotionally wrecked girl swayed her hips in tandem with the music.

"_You don't own me, I'm not just one of you're little toys," _she sang along before turning towards her mirror and pointing at her reflection. "_You don't own me, don't say I can't go with other boys." _

With the music picking up, she jumped onto her and continued her contortions.

"_Don't tell me what to do! And don't tell me what to say! And please when I go out with you, don't put me on display!" _

Her singing stopped when she heard her cell phone go off next to her laptop. Curious as to who was calling her, she lithely leapt from her bed. She then paused the music before picking up her phone and answering it without checking who's number it was.

"Hello?"

"Noel? Hey, it's Logan."

"Oh," the girl popped her lips together as she twirled around, "what do you want, Logan?"

She could tell Logan was laboring with his words, a habit of his during situations where he felt unsure of himself.

"I just...I just w-wanted to say sorry. For earlier, you know."

Noel grimaced at his inflection at the end. He had said that as if he thought that she would somehow forget about the event. However, she wasn't going to berate him over the phone. He had tried to stand up for her, and it wasn't his fault at all.

"You have nothing to apologize for," the girl purred softly. She could feel her high wearing off, and she silently cursed her luck. "Besides, Andrea's the one who should be sorry."

"She's really sorry, Noel," Logan responded almost immediately, causing Noel to let out a disgruntled chortle in response. Although Andrea hadn't openly admitted to the setup, Logan knew from her rueful disposition that she was guilty and that she regretted her impulsive action. "She is, I know she is...deep down."

Noel pinched the bridge of her nose. All day she had been going around in a figure 8, and she had enough of it for today.

"Is there anything, or is that it?"

"No...wait, yeah. There is something else. I was wondering if you were still going to come out with us tonight."

Noel laughed in disbelief. "Are you joking? For starters, it's Monday, and we have school in the morning. The fact that there is a party tonight suggests that our school is filled with a bunch of high-functioning alcoholics or something like that. More importantly, why on Earth would I want to be with people who clearly don't like me?"

"That's not true, Noel. There are people who want you to come. James and Carlos want to see you, and Callie, J.C., and Elizabeth really like you."

Although she knew that Logan meant well, she didn't care to hear anymore about this. "I'm going to hang up now, Logan."

The boy sighed in response. "Ok. But just think about it. If for whatever reason you decide to go, check your Facebook. I sent you the invite. See you around, Noel."

Noel hung up and dropped her phone onto her desk. Combing her hair out of her face, the girl picked up her computer and carried it over to her bed. Carefully sitting down on the edge, the girl logged into Facebook. When she did, she blinked in confusion when she saw that she had a new friend request.

For a minute, she did nothing but stare at the icon, thinking about whether or not she should bother with seeing who it was from. Going against her better judgment, Noel clicked and her frown soon dissipated from her face.

_Charlie Haddix_.

A smile crept its way onto her face as she thought about him. After lunch, she didn't see him except during a passing period. She wondered how the rest of his day went. Was it as horrible as her day? Noel imagined what he was doing now. Even though she didn't know much about him, he was probably at the rec center dancing alone.

Noel then noticed that she had a new event invitation. She dragged her mouse over it and clicked. She looked at the address, and she was surprised that she was actually familiar with the area. The girl starred at the address until her eyes burned.

"Fuck it," the girl mumbled. She was going to make an appearance. There were people she needed to talk to, and she was done with hiding. She would never hide again. Not from these people.

She quickly logged out of Facebook and set her laptop aside in order to find something to change into for tonight.

But before she did any of that, she accept Charlie as a friend.

* * *

"Try this," James handed a red solo cup full of beer to Carlos.

Without any hesitation, the Latino chugged the liquid down in one large gulp. As he forced down the beverage, his face contorted into disgust as he crushed the cup in his hand.

"That tasted like, like donkey piss!" the boy childishly complained. He tossed the cup onto the ground and stomped on it repeatedly.

"Care to explain how you know what donkey piss tastes like?" Logan chuckled lightly, causing James join in on the laughter as well.

"It's just a saying!" Carlos groaned at Logan, red spots flaring on his cheeks because the two were laughing at his expense. Sensing the boy's discomfort, James leaned over and playfully ruffled Carlos' hair, which caused the shorter boy to forget all about the argument.

Along with Kendall, who was keeping to himself while sitting on a leather ottoman big enough for two people to sit on, the three boys were gathered in a lone corner in the expansive family room of the Taylor household. Even though the party had just started, there were already a bunch of people, some from their high school and some that Alex met at other parties outside of their school. More people would probably show up as the night went on, but except for James, the boys didn't plan on long enough to see how crowded the house could get get before the cops showed.

Once James was done playing with his hair, Carlos stared at the remains of his cup. "What did you even give me to drink?"

"Good ol' American beer, Carlitos" the brunette heartthrob responded simply as he took a swig of his drink, his eyes scanning the room for a hot girl to flirt with later on in the night.

"Well, it was shitty," Carlos pouted as he pulled out his cell phone from his pocket. He checked to see if his cousin had responded to his text. When he saw that she hadn't yet, he sent a quick message asking where she was. "Also, to be honest, I really don't like beer to begin with."

"You have to," James chuckled as he took another sip of his drink. He then shot the boy a serious glance, the one that was always reserved for when he had to explain something to Carlos. "All men like beer."

As the two debated back and forth on the topic, Logan tapped Kendall on the shoulder.

"You ok, buddy?"

"I'm fine," the blond nodded curtly. Physically he was here, but mentally he was somewhere else, somewhere he didn't want to be.

"It's her, isn't it?"

Sighing to himself, Kendall tilted his head up in order to meet his friend's stare. "Yeah's it's her. It's always her, Logan. I just...I just don't know what to do now."

"She'll come around, Kendall," the raven-haired boy patted his friend on his shoulder. "Noel will. I just know it."

The taller boy shook his head. It was over, and Kendall felt his lungs constrict as the realization finally hit him. Closing his eyes, the blond imagined that he was a little kid again at the beach with his family. The memory scorched him, and as much as he fought, he couldn't block out the images of him swimming too far away from shore. The images of the waves rushing over him, pulling him under.

Kendall's eyes snapped open when he felt soft arms wrapping around his neck, saving him from the water. His breathing rapid and jagged, the boy turned to see that his girlfriend was now leaning against him.

"Hey, sexy," the girl greeted warmly before kissing his lips. Breaking her hold around her boyfriend, the perky beauty pulled out a whiskey bottle from her knock-off designer purse. "I got you a present."

Kendall nodded in thanks, choosing not to waste his words as he took the bottle from her. He then opened the bottle with brute strength. Tilting his head back, the boy startled everyone around him when he started down the alcoholic beverage. Although the liquid burned as it slid down his throat, Kendall kept drinking, forcing himself not to gag. When he finally felt his feet touching the ground again, the dirty blond set aside the bottle.

Her eyes overcome with worry, Andrea watched closely as her boyfriend wiped his mouth with the sleeve of his shirt. "What's wrong, Kendall?"

"Nothing's wrong," Kendall snapped back in a harsh tone.

Andrea flinched at his response. "Kendall, I can tell when there is something bothering you."

"There's nothing wrong!" the boy shouted. "For fuck's sake, will you just drop it?"

He stared at her for a minute, his expression softening as he witnessed her heart breaking into pieces. He shouldn't have exploded like that, but at the same time, he wasn't in the mood to talk with Andrea. In fact, he wasn't in the mood to talk with anyone.

The girl dropped her eyes to the floor. Taking a deep breath, the girl nodded, recovering slightly from the outburst. Her eyes then flicked at Kendall again. She saw so much sorrow in him, so much sadness, and she wondered if she had done something wrong, something to make him unhappy. Did he know that she really loved him? That she'd do anything to make him smile? To see him happy?

Although her mind told her not to push her luck, Andrea interlaced her fingers with his and marveled at how the spaces between his fingers were right where hers fit perfectly.

"I love you, Kendall," the girl whispered earnestly, allowing herself to be completely vulnerable. "You know that, right?"

The teenage boy shivered at what she said. She told him daily that she was in love with him, yet he never once said those same words back. As he turned to look at her, it finally hit him that he would never be in love with Andrea French. He would never be able to say those words to her and mean it. She wasn't what he wanted; she had been a second resort, and that's all she would ever be.

"Yeah," Kendall responded vaguely, his fingers slipping away from hers. "Yeah, I do."

Picking up the liquor bottle, the boy took another swig before standing up. Without uttering a sound, he headed into a different room. He needed to get away; he needed to be alone in order to sort out his thoughts.

Andrea watched him disappear from her. Even though she wanted to follow him, she didn't. Slinging her purse over her shoulder, the girl brushed away the wrinkles from her clothes. Once she was sure that she wouldn't break down, the blonde headed in the opposite direction in order to look for Elizabeth.

Logan had overheard the whole exchange. When it had ended, he sighed to himself, knowing that the two were hopeless. It was only a matter of time before things crashed and burned, even though he prayed that it wouldn't happen.

Turning around, the teenage genius turned his attention back to James and Carlos. He arched his eyebrow as he saw them hunched over James' phone. "What's up with you two?"

Carlos glanced up at Logan. "James just got a text from Stella. She wants the dick."

"Not just any dick, Carlos," the brunette pridefully boasted as he snapped his phone shut. "She wants _my_ dick."

Logan rolled his eyes at his friend's behavior. "You're unbelievable."

"And you're a virgin!"

Shaking his head, Logan coughed nervously, his face struggling to stay straight. "Y-yeah, b-but so is Carlos."

"Well, you'll be the last of the virgins," James mocked before slapping Carlos' shoulder. "Carlitos here is finally gonna get it in this year.

"Yeah," the Latino nodded with the same excitement that a child would feel on Christmas, "James is going to help me finally get some!"

"And how's that going to work? Is he going to have sex with you?" Logan scoffed, causing both boys to blush furiously.

"No!" they both shouted in unison before stepping away from each other. The raven-haired boy's chuckles evolved into a bellyaching laughter, one that did not please Carlos. Letting out a battle cry, Carlos jumped at Logan, causing the two to topple over the ottoman.

"James, help me!" Logan cried as Carlos roughened him up.

"Sorry, Logan," the taller boy flashed his friend a false apologetic smile, "but I'm going to go have sex with Stella now."

James shoved his way past people as he attempted to make his way to the staircase. Stella said that she was waiting in the master bedroom, and if he didn't show up in five minutes, she would find someone better. Sipping on his beer, he lost his balance when someone unexpectedly bumped into him. The contact caused him to collide into a female and his drink spilled over her shirt.

"Shit! I'm so sorry!" James gushed. His eyes moved from the stain to the girl's face. As his eyes locked onto hers, something changed within him. For the first time in his life, he felt butterflies in his stomach, and all he wanted to do now was to keep his eyes on her and never look back.

"It's fine," Elizabeth McIntosh blushed uncontrollably as she wiped at the spot on her shirt. "Accidents happen. It's really no big deal."

"You're Andrea's friend," James nodded, recognition finally settling in. "Elizabeth, right?"

The blonde smiled, happy that the boy remembered her. "Yeah, and you're-"

"James, Kendall's mate," the boy beamed with a friendly grin. "You'd think that we'd have talked before since our best friends are together."

"Y-yeah, you're right," Elizabeth giggled. She found herself staring intensely into the boy's eyes, and the colors made her feel incredibly light. Fearing that he'd say something, she dropped her head back to the stain on her shirt. She needed to do something about it now or else her father would know that she had lied to him.

"C-can I help you with that?" James offered nervously, hoping that the girl would allow him to spend some more time with her. "It's the least that I can do."

Elizabeth felt her smile deepening. She didn't know why he was having an effect on her. Andrea had told her so many bad things about him and his womanizing ways, yet she was completely charmed by him. She was wonderstruck.

"O-ok. That would be nice," the girl nodded, her eyes returning back to his as if by magic.

James returned the smile. He had long forgotten that Stella was waiting for him upstairs; that was no longer in his mind. James never saw Elizabeth coming, and he knew that whether he liked it or not, he'd never be the same.

Everything had changed.

* * *

Noel stared at the address that she had written on the back of her hand. She was at the correct place, and it was only confirmed more when she picked up on the music that was playing from inside. As she traversed up the driveway, she couldn't help but feel scared. Doubt plagued her, causing her to feel an overwhelming sense of dread. Her head kept telling her to go back home, but her heart kept pushing her forward.

This was something that she needed to do; there were things that needed to be done, and Noel was going to make things happen. As scared as she was, the time for hiding was over. She needed to be brave.

As she came to the front door, she paused as she wondered whether she should just walk in or wait for someone to answer the door. In an attempt to buy herself more time in order to calm down, she chose to ring the door bell. Her hands tucking into her back pockets, the girl fought against her better judgements, fought against the voice that was telling her to leave.

The door slowly opened, and Alex Taylor, the hostess for tonight's back to school bash, quickly pulled the girl inside, an ungodly scream leaving escaping from her lungs.

"Oh my God! It's _you!_" the girl exclaimed in a sloshed pitch. There was no denying that the dark haired girl had already passed the point of no return, and it was remarkable that she hadn't passed out already.

Noting the girl's drunken state, Noel shook her head lightly. "I think you're confused. We don't-"

"I'm so happy you're here!" Alex cut the girl off by embracing Noel, her arms practically squeezing the life out of blonde. "We can be friends. No! Best friends!"

"You're really drunk," Noel managed to speak as she somehow managed to break free.

"I know!" Alex laughed obnoxiously as she fell into Noel. "You should be, too!"

"I'm fine, thanks." Noel once again elbowed the girl away from her.

Picking up on Noel's attitude, Alex huffed in defiance. "You're starting to bore me! I'm going to go find a new friend to play with."

The drunk girl stumbled away before crashing into a random guy. Once the boy had helped her back onto her feet, Alex rewarded him with an intense make-out session, one that he was happy to oblige in.

Noel began making her way through the house. Her eyes darted from person to person as she wandered in an aimless direction. She wondered how she was going to find anyone here. There were people everywhere, and none of them noticed her. It was as if she was invisible, nonexistent. It brought out her anxiety, which started to wreak havoc on herself. She felt incredibly awkward in her skin, and she needed an escape, something to make her feel better.

She shoved her way into the kitchen and was surprised to see that it was empty. She lifted herself onto a countertop and sat there by herself. Taking a deep breath, the girl fished out the plastic baggie from her pocket. She poured the final pill into her hand, cradling as if it were her child. This was it for her: the last one. There would be no more after this one, leaving her without an avenue to turn down when things got tough. But maybe this was a blessing in disguise, a way for her to wean off this stuff. She had been using pills as a crutch for too long. It was time for her to be brave, to stand on her own two feet.

However, as she swallowed the pill, she began to think that maybe she was wrong; maybe she wasn't strong enough to support herself without them.

"What's that?" a voice spoke out of nowhere.

Noel gasped in shock, her heart skipping a beat. Cocking her head to the side, she found herself looking at Mona Blue, the girl she had been friends with once long ago.

"Fuck," Noel cursed with a slight laugh. Mona always had that ability of popping out of thin air. "You startled me."

"My bad," Mona tilted her head back, her body leaning against the wall that faced Noel. "So, are you going to tell me what you just took?"

The blonde blinked rapidly at the girl. There was a blank look on the girl, a sheen to her eyes that suggested that while her body was physically here in the room with her, her mind was far away. Noel could tell that she didn't recognize her, or if she did, she hadn't acknowledged it yet.

"It was just a pill."

Mona's eyes sparkled with interest, a smile dancing across her face. "What kind?"

"I really don't know to be honest," Noel replied faintly, her eyes drifting to her hands.

Carlos' cousin pushed herself from the wall. "Are you sick?"

"No," Noel responded instantly.

"So you abuse them in order to feel better about everything around you, huh?"

The blonde reflected over Mona's words, the meaning behind them hitting her like a concrete wall. "Y-yeah...I guess so..."

"I can relate to that," Mona smiled as she moved closer to Noel. "I did the same thing earlier tonight, but sometimes I just stop eating for a few days instead. Actually, now that I think about it, I have a lot of distractions that I turn to when the going gets rough."

Noel felt a shiver run down her spine. "Th-that isn't good."

Mona laughed at the blonde. "Doesn't stop you from taking the pills, does it? Logic doesn't matter."

"Do you remember me, Mona?" Noel asked uneasily in an effort to change the tide of the conversation. "It's me, Noel. I used to hang out with you and the boys when we were kids."

The dark haired girl closed her eyes and shook her head. "I wish I could remember you, but I'm too fucked up right now."

"O-oh," Noel managed to utter softly.

Smirking to herself, Mona opened her eyes. "Do you have any more pills?"

"That was the last one."

Mona smiled innocently at the girl. "Then let's go find you some."

Grabbing Noel's hand, the girl guided her to the sliding door that led to the patio outside. Standing outside, Noel felt Mona's hold loosen as she walked over to a fire pit farther out in the backyard. Wrapping her arms around her chest, the ex-dancer followed in the girl's footsteps. Her feet moving slowly, she began to feel herself falling victim to her high. She felt incredibly cold, and the world around her appeared to be freezing. She was becoming numb.

She watched with heavy eyes as Mona plopped into a lawn chair next to a person that Noel couldn't make out. The dark haired pixie tugged on the strangers sleeve and pointed over to Noel.

"Bo, this is Noel. We were friends before apparently."

The boy stopped rolling his joint in order to look up at Noel. "I know her. She's my chem partner."

"Oh, cool," Mona giggled as she nodded to an empty seat next to her for Noel to sit in. "Small world, yeah?"

Bo kept his eyes on Noel as she sat herself down. "What's up, Noel? Having fun tonight?"

The girl simply shrugged, her mind not able to form words at the moment. She was too transfixed with the object in Bo's lap. She looked nowhere else but at the boy's hands as he finished rolling the blunt. When he was done, he lit it and inhaled from it before passing it to Mona.

"Noel is in need of some pills, Bo, and I think you're the guy to help her," the girl mimicked Bo's actions as he exhaled sharply, the smoke floating into the air around them.

"You think so, huh?" The teenage drug dealer flicked an eyebrow at the blonde. "What do you need, partner?"

Noel's attention fell onto Bo, her head slightly tilting to the side. "Do you really deal?"

"Yep," the boy smirked as Mona handed him his joint, "and I'm a fucking good dealer, too. I have access to pretty much everything."

"How?"

Bo finished his second hit before answering. "Don't worry your pretty little head about that. Just tell me what kind of pills you're looking for, and I'll get them for you."

Noel thought for a moment as she watched the smoke rise into the night. "I'm not sure exactly."

"Ok," Bo nodded. He tapped a finger to his chin. "Well then, what kind of rush are you looking for? What result are you chasing after?"

The dancer was once again faced with a question that she didn't know the answer to. Letting out a deep breath, the girl closed her eyes tightly and searched within her heart for what she really wanted.

"Electricity," the girl mumbled to herself, her eyes opening halfway. She met the boy's confused scowl. "I want to feel as if a lightning bolt had hit me. I want to feel something intense, something that'll make me realize that I'm human and that I can feel."

Mona grinned at the description. "Oh, that sounds lovely, Noel. Really lovely."

A concern look on his face, Bo leaned forward in his seat so that he could fully capture Noel's attention.

"Don' take this the wrong way," the boy began with a soft chuckle, "but have you ever been screened for depression or something else serious like that?"

"No," Noel shook her head forcefully. "I just...I just like feeling high. Is that a better answer for you?"

"I wasn't trying to pass judgment or anything," the boy explained lightly, his smirk returning as he handed the joint back to Mona. "I'm just making sure that everything's alright, you know? Insurance policy so that I know you're not going to try and overdose on them."

"I'm not," Noel replied faintly.

Bo remained silent for a moment, and Noel thought that he wasn't going to help her, that he wasn't going to give her anymore pills. However, that changed when he let out a low sigh and ran a hand through his hair.

"Right now I'm dry, but I'll be getting more later this week."

Noel broke out into a silly grin. "Thank you, Bo!"

The boy returned her smile as Mona returned the joint to him. Staring at the blunt for a brief second, the boy handed it back to Mona and then nodded in Noel's direction.

"So, you're in then, partner?" the boy asked. He was expecting her to back down, to think things over and suddenly realize what she was actually getting herself into. But that didn't happen. Instead, Noel took the joint from Mona and nodded her head at Bo.

"I'm in, partner."

* * *

Noel felt good. Her head felt lighter than a cloud, yet her legs weighed a ton, an out of body experience that would make her erupt into a fit of giggles anytime she thought about it. She had been outside with Mona and Bo for over an hour, sharing the joint amongst the three of them. Each time it made its way around the circle to her, she took a puff, losing count after the fourth or fifth time.

Her paranoia heightened as she stepped back into the house full of people. It was still as crowded as when she had first arrived, the atmosphere loud and chaotic. There were people everywhere, and even though they were lost in their own affairs, Noel couldn't shake off the feeling that everyone was looking at her.

"Come on," Bo cheered goofily while throwing his lanky arms around both girls. "Let's get a beer."

From the corner of her eyes, Noel spotted Mona interlacing her fingers with his as they made their way to the opened kegs in the living room area. As soon as she did that, Bo let out a nervous chuckle before breaking free from her hold. Having realized what she had done, Mona shot Bo a concerned look, her eyes solemn with remorse. Bo quickly shot her a silly look, one that drew a smile from her, even though the sadness was still present in her expression.

When the three teenagers finally managed to squeeze into the spacious living room, Noel couldn't believe how packed the room was. There were people sprawled all over the place, devouring any free space in their sight. To her left, there was even a couple trying to be as discrete as possible as they engaged in a hookup that they would later regret behind a couch.

"I think I'm going to go," Noel shouted over the loud music that was playing, but her statement went unnoticed by Bo and Mona. Sighing to herself, Noel decided to follow the two as they shoved their way through a mosh pot that had formed in the middle of the room. When she made it on the other side, she was amazed that they had made it to the kegs without getting severely injured.

Bo tried pouring himself beer, but all of the kegs were empty.

"This has to be a fucking joke," the boy groaned as he tapped his foot in annoyance against the last keg. "How can the beer already be gone?"

Mona rolled her eyes at him before turning to survey her surroundings. "There's got to be alcohol here somewhere..."

Sighing to herself, Noel helped with in Mona's search, but she didn't find any alcohol. Instead, she spotted Andrea in an adjacent room, chatting with Callie on some leather couch. Noel's nostrils flared up, and her eyes darkened. Without any warning, she made her way towards the two as if gravity was pulling her to them. She could hear Mona calling after her, but she didn't bother to reply. In fact, she had blocked out everything besides Andrea French.

"We need to talk," the dancer forced out strongly, her voice taking on a new, stronger pitch. Andrea looked to be startled, and Noel relished in the sight. Her arms wrapping around her chest, the ex-dancer psyched herself for war as her enemy glanced up at her.

"What the hell are you doing here?"

"Don't you remember?" Noel chuckled darkly as she flipped her hair back. "I was invited."

Andrea exchanged a quick look with Callie before narrowing her eyes on Noel. "Well, now you're uninvited so leave."

"You're not going to get rid of me that easily," Noel warned venomously. "I'm not going anywhere."

"Fine," Andrea waved her hand as she stood up from the couch. "If you're not going to fuck off, then I'll just leave."

However, Noel wasn't ready for Andrea to walk away. She wasn't through with her yet. Acting on impulse, the new girl grabbed onto the taller girl's wrist, yanking her back towards her.

"What exactly did I do to you, Andrea?" the girl spat, her nails starting to dig harshly into the girl's flesh. "Tell me what the fuck did I do to deserve your bullshit?"

As Noel's grip tightened, Andrea winced in pain, fear wiping away her smugness. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Intervening on her friend's behalf, Callie flung Noel's hand off Andrea. "Noel, stop this! You're acting insane!"

Noel clicked her tongue to the roof of her mouth. She then shifted her eyes back to Andrea.

"I'll leave if you tell Callie that you're the one responsible for putting that bracelet into my pocket."

Callie turned to stare at her friend. "Please Andrea, tell me you didn't."

Andrea bowed her head to the ground, unable to speak on her behalf. The action, however, was louder than any verbal confession.

"Got nothing to say then?" Noel gloated as she leaned forward to whisper into Andrea's ear. "You're pathetic, Andrea."

Suddenly snapping out of her state, Andrea shoved Noel off her. "If I'm pathetic, then what the fuck are you, Noel? Kendall's told me all about how you hid in your room over the summer."

The confidence that Noel felt was killed. "He-he wouldn't do that."

"Oh, but he did," the mean girl nodded, her expression dark and grave. She had found Noel's weak spot, and she wasn't going to stop her assault. "We actually laughed about it a lot. That's how much of a joke you are, Noel, and that's all you'll ever be."

Noel's armor had been pierced; she had been slayed. She could feel her eyes starting to water, and it wouldn't be long until she started crying in front of everyone. Looking around the room, her stomach clenched as she realized that everyone was looking at her, whispering about her. When she looked over her shoulder, she even saw Mona and Bo staring at her. Even though they were all staring at her as if she were crazy, she wasn't going to let them see her cry.

As bolted out of the room, Andrea let out a loose breath. "Fucking bitch is like shit on my stiletto."

Callie shot her friend a disapproving look. "Seriously Andrea, this isn't ninth grade anymore."

Flinching at the comment, Andrea placed her hands behind her back. Her eyes then fell upon Kendall, who had overheard everything that she had said. However, before she could call out to him, he was already gone, and she knew instantly where he had gone off to.

He was going to find Noel.

A chill ran down Noel's spine as she stepped into the night. The air stun more than usual, biting at her skin. It was becoming harder to breathe, and to her, it felt like the world was knocked off it's axis. She wasn't sure if she wanted to cry or not.

She wrapped her arms around her chest, her head hanging low. As she began the lonely voyage home, she realized she had never felt more defeated than now. There was no winning for her, no chance of bouncing back from everything. She had allowed Andrea to get the best of her; she had made a fool of herself in front of everyone. The damage was done, and there was no way for her to recover from it.

Noel felt her eyes dampen, and she bit her bottom lip in response. She wasn't going to be _that girl_, the one who cries on the walk home from a party. However, she had little strength; she couldn't stop that single tear from cascading down her pale face. Wiping at it furiously, the broken girl cursed out loud. Life hadn't been fair to her, and it looked as if it never would be. Why couldn't she get a break? A moment of reprieve from all of the shit in her life: that's all she wanted. A single moment of happiness that sadly would never come.

Her ears picked up at the sound of a car coming her way. Tilting her head to the side, she was blinded by its bright lights, which illuminated her dejected state. Although it was hard to fully discern, she instantly knew who's car it was, and she found herself turning away in agitation.

With her back turned to Kendall's car, the girl continued on with her trek home. She hoped that Kendall would finally get the message, that he would finally leave her alone. However, Kendall was too stubborn to walk away from her.

Kendall rolled down the passenger window and called out to her. "Noel, get in."

Noel laughed at the response, another tear unwillingly falling from her eyes. "I'm not supposed to get in cars with strangers."

"Good thing I'm not a stranger then," Kendall retorted while parking his car next to her.

The girl whipped towards him, her rage finally getting the best of her. "Can't you take a hint? Leave me the fuck alone, Kendall."

"I'm not going to do that, Noel," Kendall responded forcefully.

Their eyes locked, and Noel's anger was erased by the look that he was giving her. He cared, and he wasn't going to stop caring for her, even though she had told him to many times. Come hell or high water, he wasn't going to leave her alone, and that scared her in way that she liked.

"Fine," Noel relented with a mumbled sigh under her breath. "Stubborn _prick_."

Even though she didn't want to, Noel cried as Kendall drove. He hadn't spoken since she had gotten into the car. The only sounds that filled the car were the sounds of Noel's cries and the hushed melodies playing from the radio.

After an hour had passed, they had reached their destination. Kendall pulled the car to the side of the road and cut the engine. He turned and smiled softly at her. "We're here."

Noel was confused. All she could see were trees. "Where are we?"

"You'll see," Kendall laughed as he climbed out of the car. He walked over to Noel's side and opened the door for her.

"You're not going to murder me, are you?" Noel asked in mock seriousness, a smile slowly creeping onto her face.

"Don't be stupid," Kendall rolled his eyes at her before offering her his hand. She accepted it, and he helped her out of the car. Their hands still connected, he led her across the road and through a clearing in the trees a few yards away from where he had parked.

Walking through the woods provided Noel with a sense of comfort. They were alone with their changing minds. The only company they had was nature, and in the nighttime, everything looked more serene, more beautiful. When they had made it to the edge of the trees, Noel felt a sense of nostalgia tickle at her.

She knew this place; she had been here before long ago.

"Do you now know where we are?" Kendall inquired softly, his voice barely above a whisper.

Noel nodded as she looked at the world that stretched out in front of her. They were standing on a field of grass that expanded farther out to a large lake. Even from where they stood, Noel could make out the tiny ripples that reflected the moon's silver glow.

"I do," she answered as her smile widened. "We used to feed the ducks here when we were little."

Kendall looked down at the girl, his face brightening because she had remembered. Hand in hand they walked closer towards the lake. When they reached the bank, they both sat down in the grass. Although their hands had separated, they sat close enough so that their shoulders touched. For a while, the two sat in silence and stared out into the lake with nothing but the crickets making noise.

After some time had passed, Kendall turned to study Noel. In such an intimate position, he found himself watching the movements that her breasts made as she breathed. When he realized what he was doing, he lifted his gaze to Noel's face, his breathing matching hers.

"I still come here all the time. Hardly anyone is here when I do, so it's like my secret place."

"Well, now I know about it, so it's no longer a secret," the girl joked, causing Kendall to chuckle.

"Technically you've always known about it."

Noel broke her gaze and turned to look at Kendall. "So, do you come here when things...when they, like, get too rough?"

"Yeah," Kendall breathed out contently, his eyes connecting with hers. "Whenever I need to escape from something."

"Huh," Noel nodded. She then thought about her escape and how it differed from his. "I like that. It sounds...nice."

"I'm sorry for earlier," Kendall rushed out, catching Noel completely off guard. "I'm sorry for letting my temper get the best of me."

Noel shook her head. "I don't blame you."

Another moment of stillness came, but the two welcomed it. They took the time to get reacquainted with one another, their eyes still locked onto each other. There was a lot to be learned, a lot that needed to be said, but there eyes were enough to convey their basic feelings, a way for them to start the healing process for their relationship.

When the moment became too intense, Kendall gulped in eagerness. "Are you ever going to tell me what's wrong, Noel?"

"I don't know, Kendall," the girl responded sadly. "How about you?"

"Me?"

"Yeah," the girl whispered as she felt her body gravitating closer towards his. "What's gotten under your skin?"

Kendall reacted dangerously as more of Noel's body pressed against his. He wanted more; he wanted to feel more of her.

"A lot of things have."

"And you probably don't want to talk about them either, right?"

Kendall licked his lips. "Y-yeah. Makes sense."

He needed to touch her. It didn't matter that he had a girlfriend waiting for him, a girl that was madly, deeply in love with him, because all he wanted now was Noel. And from the way she was inching her face closer to his, he knew that she felt the same; she wanted him just as much as he wanted her.

If only for a night.

His hand made its way to her face. "I missed you, Noel."

The girl let out a stifled moan as his fingers caressed her skin. "I-I missed you, too, Kendall. A lot more than you think."

Kendall was sold. Nothing had been resolved between the two, but the simple confession from her was enough to push that thought out of his mind.

With a shaky breath, the boy closed the distance between them, and their lips touched. It felt like they had been hit by lightning, and Noel felt more alive than ever. A hunger raged within her, and she was going to feed the flames.

Her hands wrapping around his neck, the girl pulled him on top her, their movements getting sloppy as the kiss intensified. Kendall's hands began to roam her body as they embarked on new territory.

When Noel was least expecting it, Kendall pulled away from the girl.

"No," he shook his head, his breathing labored as guilt ate at him. "I ca-can't do this."

Noel bit her bottom lip, and she missed how he tasted against her mouth. His kiss had turned her into an animal. She didn't want this to end; she wanted to finish what they had started.

"I don't care," her hand tilted his chin back towards her. "I don't care about her. Just...don't stop."

Staring into her eyes, Kendall felt his resolve melting as Noel pulled his face towards hers, and once their lips touched again, their fates were sealed.

* * *

The first rays of morning light hit Noel, awakening her from her slumber. When her eyes opened, a smile tugged at the corners of her lips. Kendall was still beside her, still holding her in his arms. There was nowhere else she would rather be right now. All the pain she had went through, all the misery she had wallowed in for quite some time on her own, led her here. It didn't matter if this was an accident that would never happen again or the beginning of something new. In this moment, she had never been happier, not in a long time at least.

And it felt good to be happy.

In the stillness, Noel studied Kendall as he slept. His breathing was melodic, as if his lungs were in rhythm with the crickets' final song before the sun finally rose. Laying in the grass in nothing more than his boxers, he reminded her of Adam, which made her his Eve. The original lovers and the original sinners. Smiling at the thought, the girl placed her hand over his heart, her eyes gazing over his body in lust. Long hockey practices had done his body good; he was no longer that scrawny little kid that he used to be. He was developing into a man.

Her admiration of his athletic physique was ended when she felt his heart beat against her palm. Curiosity taking over, she cautiously leaned forward and placed her ear against his chest, careful not to stir him from his sleep. Her smile widened as she listened to what her hand had touched. She could listen to this song all the time, and she would never get tired of it. There was no other music she'd rather dance to than Kendall's heartbeat.

Before she fell asleep again, Noel moved away gently and looked up at the boy's face. She felt overwhelmed with joy at the sight of him, at how content and innocent he looked while sleeping. Her fingers lightly brushing at his hair, the girl placed her lips against his before removing his arm around her body. As soon as she did that, she felt cold, and she wanted his arm back around her as if she couldn't live without his bare skin against her. He felt so good against her; he had made her feel so _good_.

The girl gathered her things and got dressed. Not bothering to put her shoes back on, she turned to look at Kendall one last time. She didn't love him, at least she didn't _think_ she did, and she didn't think that Kendall loved her. He had a girlfriend, and Noel didn't expect him to dump Andrea for her. She wasn't ashamed for being the other woman, for being involved in Kendall's infidelity. The two completely let go. Damn the consequences; they lived in the moment, and it was good.

A part of her felt guilty for leaving him here, but deep down she knew that he would understand why she had left him. After placing one last kiss on his cheek, Noel left the woods and made her way back to the empty road.

Walking barefoot on a road that she was familiar with at one time in her life, Noel couldn't shake the smile off her face. She felt lighter than air, as if she could burst into a fit of giggles at any second. It was incomparable to her previous highs; it was a sensation more electrifying than what her pills had given her. This wasn't artificial.

This was real.

Throwing her head back, Noel found herself staring straight into the horizon. She paused in the middle of the street. The sun was rising, and the darkness from night was being consumed by the light. She had never seen the sun rise before, but she was taking mental pictures of it in her mind so that she would never forget it.

A new feeling swam inside her, a feeling that she hadn't felt in a long time: hope. Here was her fresh start, her new beginning. It had been there all along, but she had forgotten about it while running as fast as she could. Numbing herself wasn't the answer to her problems; it wasn't the course that was going to lead her to happiness. She just needed to keep herself open, keep herself in the fight, and she'd find her way, find her happiness. And that didn't mean she had to let go of all the things that she used to love.

Her wounds and her past wouldn't go away; she'd always have those scars on her heart. But they were just that: wounds. She could recover from them, and she could heal from them. She could live life with them. They didn't define her. She was the one who connected the dots.

Noel kept her gaze to the horizon and finally let out the laugh that had been building up inside of her. There was still uncertainty, still things that remained unknown, but that didn't matter now because she was happy right now.

Anything could happen, and that excited her.

* * *

Noel hadn't been in a dance studio since her mother's closed. As she entered the room, a sense of nostalgia chilled her to the bone. This was her homecoming, her welcome back to a world that she never thought she'd travel to again.

Although she hadn't been in this exact studio before, it reminder her of all the ones that she knew, all the ones she grew up in. In her mind, she could see herself as a little girl at the ballet barre. The same excitement from when she was 4 was still with her at 17. This was her home, and it always would be her home. Dancing would always be a part of her, and she was foolish for thinking that she could let go of it.

Cocking her head to the side, Noel remained silent as she watched the young man dance before her. She found herself lost in his routine, her eyes never leaving him. He was in his own world, one with the music and with his movements. The chocolate haired boy was performing his own routine, his own set of steps that correlated with the upbeat tempo. He wasn't trying to impress anyone with fancy techniques (but Noel could tell by his fluid transitions that he was an impeccable dancer). He just danced, and loved every second of it.

With a final turn, the music died, and his routine came to an end. Opening his eyes, Charlie became startled when he saw the girl's reflection in the dance mirror in front of him. His face instantly reddened when he realized that she had been watching him the whole time.

"Oh," the male dancer puffed out nervously as he turned around to greet Noel. He met Noel's gaze and gave her an insecure smile. "H-hey, Noel."

She took a step forward and clapped her hands together. "You're really good, Charlie."

The color on his face intensified. "Th-thanks."

Noel lightly giggled at the boy's nervousness. Dropping her bag to the floor, the girl tiptoed her way towards him. Charlie's eyes never left Noel as she stared at herself in the mirror.

"I didn't see you at lunch today," the girl commented to Charlie while gazing at her reflection.

His eyes followed to her reflection as well. "I was looking for you, but I didn't find you, so I ended up eating by myself."

Noel tore her eyes away from her image and gave Charlie an apologetic look. "I'm sorry."

"It's ok," the boy shrugged, the color on his face still red. "I don't want to sound rude, but wh-why are you here?"

"Isn't it obvious?" the girl motioned to her dance attire, causing Charlie to laugh.

"You told me that you gave up dancing."

A moment of silence fell between the two, and Charlie wondered if he had said the wrong thing. Noel resumed looking at herself in the mirror, staring at the girl she was now trying to get back to.

"That's what I thought I wanted," the girl explained softly. She took a deep breath before turning to face Charlie, her new friend. "I...I didn't know what I wanted. For the last few months, I've been trying to be my old self again, but...I didn't want that at the same time..."

Charlie shot the girl a confused smirk. "I don't really follow."

"I know, it's confusing," the girl chuckled while combing her hand through her blonde locks. "A lot's happening that I can't control, but that doesn't mater. All I know for sure is that I want to dance again."

Charlie nodded in response. He didn't necessarily understand everything, but he didn't need to. Maybe Noel would clarify things in the future. All that mattered right now was that she was here.

"Well, I'm glad you came. It's nice not being so alone," Charlie smiled, his way of letting Noel know that everything was going to be ok.

Noel nodded in agreement before taking a step back. Turning around, she spotted Charlie's iPOD that was connected to portable speakers.

"So," she began while shooting Charlie a look over her shoulder, "are you going to teach me the routine that you were doing or..."

"Sure!" Charlie beamed as he dashed to his iPod. "I'd be happy to do that!"

He picked up the electronic and put on the song that had just finished playing. Gently placing the device down, he rushed back next to Noel as the first few notes of the song started to play.

"From the top?" he asked energetically.

Noel smiled, his energy contagious. "From the top."

* * *

_A/N: Well, shit. That was a lot longer than I expected, but you know what, I'm happy with it. Some things could have been done better, but for the most part, I'm content with it._

_Anyways, I'm more excited about what YOU all have to say! Love it? Hate it? Excited that the story is finally taking off? Whatever your opinion, let me know! Send in a review and tell me everything that you're feeling-I'd greatly appreciate it! _

_The next chapter will be James'! If you'd like, there's a promo video for it on the Big Time Rush: Skins tumblr! Just click on my profile page, and you'll find a link to it! _

_Until next time, _

_Cheers! _

_XOXO_


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